Daisy Potter and You-Know-Poo's Return (Book 4, Harry Potter ff)

Chapter 4 - Beautiful Unlike You-Know-Poo

I procrastinated writing this for so long

Sorry

"So fucking rude." I muttered under my breath as Jerk carried me to the cemetery, Wormtail and baby Voldy Godric knows where, and my scar searing with pain.

And by carried, I mean flung over his flipping back like a friggin five year old.

"Well, maybe if you had've just cooperated like any sane person, maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't have to treat you like a toddler and carry you there." Jerk shook his head at me. "Such a child, honestly."

"Please, pretty please put me down and I PROMISE to cooperate!" I begged, making wide puppy eyes at him, using my amazing upper-body strength (I literally have, like zero) to push myself up level with his head instead of the way he was carrying me making my face hit against his ass every time he took a step. He immediately looked in the opposite direction and said, "Nope. Not falling for it, you little bitch."

"Damn."

We were silent for a few minutes, then -

"I really bloody hate you."

"YOU hate ME? I should be the one saying that about YOU!"

"Well sorry, Miss Priss! Sorry that your boss didn't force you to kidnap an innocent girl -"

"- I'm not really that innocent, TBH -"

"- And would have killed you if you hadn't and you now have to deal with an angry bitch and your damned conscience won't leave you alone -"

"Well sorry that I fucking got KIDNAPPED - like, you know, no biggy - and now I have to endure possible months of torture and death -"

"- How can you endure months of death?"

"Both of you twats just shut up? Thanks." I heard a familiar voice say, and just as we stepped around another huge tomb-thing, we saw Wormtail, who was glaring at us, his inner Marauder obviously having came out, carrying baby Voldy.

There was a cauldron filled with water or something standing near a massive grave with a grey stone angel standing over it creepily. Jerk gently flipped me over and set me on the grave, flicked his wand, and the damn thing moved, trapping me against the gravestone with its arm.

"I apologise for what we are about to do." He said sincerely, getting out a pack of mint Tic-Tacs and popping one in his mouth.

"Ooh, can I have some?" I said excitedly.

"'Course." Jerk tipped a few into my hand, and I sucked on them happily.

Then I remembered my situation, and I was sad again.

Wormtail tipped Voldemort into the cauldron and started doing all this creepy ritualistic shit, making me wonder if he was summoning Satan or worshiping him or something. Then I remembered that I was Satan.

First, he drew bone dust from Voldemort's dad's grave, which was seriously bizarre. Then he chopped off his own damn hand and started crying and stuff (like, I would too, I don't blame him). Then he came over to ME and bloody cut open my arm, and dripped my blood into the cauldron too.

Needless to say, somehow, that resurrected Voldemort.

He stepped out of the cauldron, tall and bald and nose-less, red eyes shining through the darkness that had settled around us.