Disorder (Ayato x reader)

Joy and pain

I was in the middle of my working when I heard Ayato's footsteps.
"Oi, I'm home" he hissed, walking to the shower without any other words. "You early this time, aren't you?" I asked him, hoping for the answer that never came up because he was busy now. I sigh lightly and kept doing my thing. This was a way of killing time, since I had to do nothing the past week. "Tch, are you still doing this shit?" he asked me in his low tone, making me only roll my eyes. Well, he leaved only two hours ago. "Hinami will pay a visit today" he whispered, almost like he was neither sad nor excited.
"Ne, ne, It's have been a time since the last time she was at our place, right Ayato?" I smiled to him as he only closed his eyes and rub his head. Hinami and I was really good friends. She told me everything – about her parents, about her oni chan, about Ayato's sister, about the place she came from, all her friends and fights...
I liked her because of the true person she was. Even Kiki, was a person which was aspiring to perfection. Hinami just wanted to be her true self, without need to be the best.

I closed my works as a yawn loudly. I was really tired; working too much on the computer was always tiring me. "How was today? Something new?" I asked Ayato, who was sitting on the couch and watching news. "Fine" He muttered, scratching his head. I walked and sat next to him, putting my head on his shoulder. "Boring~" I breath out as he rolled his eyes, watching that women talking and talking about the CCG, which was getting really strong the last passed time. "Kiss me~" I whispered, putting my head on his lap now, laying on him.
"Shut up already" he said, not taking his eyes off this girl. Is it really interesting? "What is it?" I asked as I looked at those CCG's, wondering why he is watching them.
"One of the CCG attack Himani earlier, luckily I was there and stop them, but it was hard" he whispered the last part. I get it now – he was wondering why they got so strong. "It because of those weapons" I point to the TV. "Huh?" he said with a confused expression. "I know who it was, my sister and my best friend, they probably got killed, I saw them."

"Hinami! Tell me something new!" I said all over excited to her visit.
"Well nothing really changed! Haha...but I did got a new book..." she smiled innocently. "You are so boring" I said as she only giggled. Suddenly she stop her laugh. Her eyes filled with fear and sadness. Before I could say anything, a husky voice cut me off – "I'm going off, I would probably get back late" he said as he opened the door and Disappeared.
I looked back at Hinami, who was looking at the floor as she hold tight her skirt.
I can guess she reacted like this to Ayato's present. The question was is why. – "Hinami – san, why are you like this all of a sudden?" I asked her, hearing no answer. The silence was mysterious; making me wonder why is she like this. Did Ayato do something to her?
"Hinami, tell me" I ordered, getting pissed off.
She continued to stare at the floor and her gaze was still scared. After several minutes of silence on both sides, she finally opened her mouth, ready to say something. "I'm sorry" she said, makes me confused. "I..." she spoke as she cleared her throat. "I think I fell in love with Ayato".

Her words trembled and a little hesitation was heard. It took me some time to absorb what she said. The tears were already flowing down her face as she muttering the word "sorry".
Suddenly it hit me. I felt my throat filled with tears, as my hands turn to fits. I felt a sharp pain in the ribs. What scared me most was the Question why. Did Ayato know that?
And what if... he feels the same? I wasn't sure about my feeling or acts now, but I just leaved that place, hoping I will find peaceful place. So many thoughts went through my head, making me break a little bit more every time.
~He will fall for her too, I'm sure
~He knew it? He tries to hide it?
~ She's my friend... I can't hurt her feelings.
~Why did she come into my life anyway...She brings only bad things to me.
~He wouldn't lie to me...
I hate these feelings!!! She's my friend and I can't hurt her, but Ayato is mine and I love him too, why I feel like a piece of shit?
Because I knew it.
I knew it would happen, and still, I didn't fight for him.
It disgusts me.

I gasped and leaned on the rail. I heard footsteps coming. I didn't runaway, it's Ayato, I'm sure.
Suddenly, a bright and strong light made me see nothing. After I blinked sometimes,I could see CCG investors. And they were many. How did they know I'm a ghoul? I didn't do anything wrong.
I could hear a giggle from one of them; maybe it was because of my wondering face. They started to run to me, ready for a fight.
I didn't want to start this, but I had no choice.