Dear Diary: It's A Secret

Dear Diary: Chapter 12

February 18th, 2015

Dear Diary:

Last year I was in student council, art society, drama society, democracy club, and dance club. I took out time to do all that stuff. It was tiring at times, and very time conceiving, yet I looked at it as a way to forget about everything around me.

I would sit in art society every Wednesday and draw my heart out, all painful thoughts leaving my mind in the process.

In democracy club it was all about the elections, and who to vote for which always kept me busy trying to find information to support my side. Leaving me with no time to think of anything other than the elections.

Dance was complicated. I never was a great dancer, yet still I went there, took the risk of making myself look like a fool in front of everyone.

At last I had student council. It was always a chance for me to change something, and for once there would be no need for it to be anything bad. For once I was given the opportunity to bring a change and be appreciated.

But moving on, that was all in the past. Now I don't bother doing any of that. I don't waste my time thinking that one day life would be better, and the darkness surrounding me would vanish. I have been exposed to the truth many times, even though plenty of those times I refused to believe it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Flashback To A Conversation Between Serena And Asim*

"Hey," I whispered to Asim sliding into the seat behind him.

Asim didn't bother replying instead opened up his phone to snapchat, fixing his camera on me.

"Smile," he remarked.

I posed for the camera, plastering a small smile on my face as he took the photo. I leaned over his shoulder, watching as he typed in, 'My Bestie', putting the picture as his story.

"What was that for?" I asked after awhile, a smile playing on my lips. Asim made me feel wanted, made me want to live, and at times he didn't even realize how much his randomly done sweet gestures meant to me.

He turned to me, his blue eyes glistening with happiness.

"I don't think there should be a specific reason to let everyone know you're my best friend," he commented, a genuine smile on his face.

"What if one day we won't be best friends?" I questioned, the thought suddenly invading my mind.

He shook his head, his eye's boring into my own. "That day would never come," he promised.

But he was wrong.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Just stare into my eyes for once , and baby I'll be telling you how rocking you are," a boy in front of me sang in his horrible voice to the girl next to him.

I rolled my eyes at the boy's stupid moves, and the girl's constant blushing as she playfully smacked his head.

Was the song he was singing even exist?

"Just shut up for the rest of the class, and boy if you don't, I'll be punching you in the face," I sang to him, after a few minutes of hearing his rubbish.

The girl stifled her giggles, as the boy turned to me, frozen in his seat.

"Okay," he concluded at last, nodding his head.

"Oh you just got told," another boy sitting next to me commented.

I shook my head, turning back to the physic's assignment I had to finish before the end of the class. All the work teachers assign us these days.

"Serena," another voice called.

I groaned in annoyance, looking up to my left side to meet Paisley eyes.

"What?" I snapped, tired of being civil all the time.

"You're not doing it right," she explained quietly. "It's like this." She placed her paper in front of me, expecting me to make sense of all the numbers and formulas she had placed on her paper.

"Okay..." I trailed off. "Want to explain how to do it then?"

She nodded, and quickly went off to explaining, while I dozed off into my own little world after attempting to concentrate on what she was saying.

Please, paying attention should be one thing that shouldn't be expected from me. My mind was more focused on the continuous ticking of the clock, the conversation the people were having in front of me, and the people entering and leaving class.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I leaned against the door of the library, watching him chat with his friends, while I waited for the bell to ring. He looked happy like always, but there was nothing that didn't make me wonder what if that smile on his face was fake? What if all this was an act? What if from the inside he was just broken, like some of us?

I was currently in the library with all my other fellow classmates from history class, apparently ordered to research on liberalism or was it communism? But, by now people should know I never follow the rules. Whatever I do, I like to do it according to my wish. And doing some research on freedom was not one of them.

For an unfortunate moment Adagio's hazel eyes with specks of orange met mine, the smile on his face vanishing as he stared at me as though I was a disease which would suddenly attack him. His golden brown hair had grown longer than the last time I remembered, adorning his olive skin tone.

I glanced away, averting eye contact with him at any cost. He wasn't worth my attention, nor my time.

I hadn't talked to him, since my outburst, and too be honest I hadn't expected him to talk to me anymore. One by one everyone gave up on me, which made Adagio's case nothing new. I was used to it.

Luckily my English and physic's teacher had given me some extra worksheets and videos to watch to understand the concept of what we were currently learning. Perhaps before the end of the year I would be able to catch up.

"Ding, ding," at last went the bell signalling the end of the day.

Out of pure curiosity I turned to Adagio, only to find his eyes fixed on me. He stood up running a hand through his hair, as he took long strides towards me.

I didn't make a move, instead waited there, leant against the door, while he made his way to me. Suddenly my heart beats rapidly gained speed, as every step he took got him closer to me.

I curled my trembling fingers into a fist, placing them behind me, just as Adagio stepped in front of me.

Him being at such a close distance made me nervous. Letting a tingling feeling settle in my stomach.

What came out of his mouth next, was something I sure hadn't expected.

"Female dog," he muttered, swiftly walking out of the library, even before I got the chance to react.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hey, Salut, Assalamwaliakum, Hola, or Hallo.

How is making another person's day turning out for you guys?

I've been a little busy with other things, so I couldn't update. Sorry about that.

Question of the day:

Your favourite song of the week?

Anyways goodbye for now!

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