Dear Diary: It's A Secret

Dear Diary: Chapter 22

May 25th, 2015

Dear Diary:

I guess this was it. That was all I needed to fix the life I left five years ago. Yeah not everything went back to the way it was, but I felt as though I could be happy for once. I could feel again.

The emotions I kept hidden for so long, were now out in the open. This was what I wanted. I wanted to feel again. To love, and to be loved. To care, and to be cared for. To hate, and to be hated- well not as much as I would have liked to be loved.

But, this was life. This was how everything worked. Not everything happened our way.

I didn't tell Tyler about Damon's letter, because for some reason I felt as if it was meant to be a secret. And a secret I would keep it.

I wasn't mad at Damon for anything he did. There was no point in that. He was dead, long gone.

Tyler started coping better with Damon's death. He started smiling and making jokes again, and even hanging around more often. They all did. Anaya, Paisley and I would go shopping once in awhile. Adagio would even hang around them all when I would ask him to, I just couldn't tell if he liked them or not.

But that didn't matter. Because no matter what, I wasn't ready to leave Adagio, just like he hadn't left my side- excluding that little while. In the end we did become friends, and maybe something a bit more. Yet whatever it was, I was happy with it, I didn't need anything else.

I even started talking to Asim again. It was weird at first, and sometimes gets a little uncomfortable when we run out of topics, but at the end of the day I know he truly wants to be friends with me.

I sent a letter back to my sister, telling her everything I wanted to say in the past five years. She didn't care about the hurtful words I used, she was too happy about the fact that I finally replied to notice anything else. She's getting married on July 18th, and I'm looking forward to attending it.

As for beauty and beast, I hate them. However, from the bottom of my heart I love my parents. I don't like what has become of them today, but I will never let myself forget what they were yesterday.

I guess this is it. A goodbye, perhaps? But to who? This notebook? The pain?

I don't know.

What I do know is that I survived. I became a hero by surviving the storm. A true hero.

"Hey Adagio," I greeted, when I was close enough to his car.

He looked up from the game he was playing on his phone, and shot me a smile.

"Hey, you ready?" He asked, pushing himself away from his car and opening the passenger door for me.

We were currently headed to the carnival on a Saturday evening, to hang out with Anaya, Paisley, Tyler, and Asim.

I rolled my eyes, getting in the car, then waited for him to get in before I answered his question. Obviously I was ready, which would explain why I was out here.

"No, I still need to go get ready, just came to tell you that," I muttered sarcastically, causing him to chuckle.

"Hey Adagio," I said, suddenly a memory of when Adagio used to talk to me when he first arrived, entered my mind.