A/N: Probably writing this at a very sleep deprived time so ta da!!
More alert A/N: Sorry if it sucks. Also, you can request more than 3 items. The item request limit is 10.
Junk Drawer Request: @Herb_the_Sumo
I walk into the pub to buy fish and chips, because I am British.
I order the deliciousness with a spot o tea and take my fried fish gladly, ready to become a vacum and eat everything.
I notice a strange man with a beard nasty af and continue eating.
He stares at me and gets up slowly, handing me a fork, which is suprisingly clean.
I finish my fish and walk outside, enjoying ye good ol smells of the harbor.
As I continue walking I feel a strange feeling in my buttocks.
I Usain Bolt to the restroom to take a massive shit.
When finished relieving meself, I got up to flush the toilet. I noticed something.
I squat down and notice an Illuminati symbol! Bloody Bollocks!
I reach into my pocket and pull out the fork, pulling out the Illuminati symbol. I Hulk Smash it into the sink and turn on the water, cleaning it.
I walk out and I am suddenly attacked by a flash of pink and green. I flop like a fish and realize I'm trapped in curtains.
"Calm the fuck down." An angelic voice speaks, slapping my face. I was certain it was a beautiful woman. I scramble out of the curtains and am face to face with the man from the pub.
"Who the bloody hell are you!?" I ask, rushing away.
"Im the leader of the Illuminati. Now come, it's time for your new job shit head." I nod and follow the disgusting man.
"I have one more thing to share." He says, yanking his beard. He reveals a beautiful woman with golden blonde hair. Her voice changes yet again to something very ratchet.
She pulls off her hair and reveals Miley Cyrus.
I start my new job and get my first customer, a young man.
"Hello what would you like to order?" I ask.
"Fish and Chips."
