In the end

Chapter 31 - Run

I shouldn't have stayed the night. It was selfish and stupid and I knew I would pay for it later. I should never have let myself fall for him, but I didn't regret a single moment we spent together. I lay there, listening to his steady breathing, trying desperately to imagine any outcome where I could stay with him. But I couldn't. I had no choice but to go. I screwed up, I never should have let myself care about him. He didn't deserve what could happen to him if someone found me. I remembered the photographer outside of my apartment and tried to hold back my tears. I cared about him enough that it made my choice for me. One that would keep him safe.

I slid out of bed carefully so I didn't wake him and quickly dressed. I found a pen and paper and wrote him a note. There was so much more that I wanted to tell him but in the end I said the two things I meant the most. I tried to close the front door as quietly as possible and cringed when the locked clicked. I didn't wait to see if the sound woke him, I turned in the opposite way of the elevators and sprinted down the hall until I found the stairs. I glanced at my phone and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that it was just after 4 am. I should have enough time to grab a few things and be gone before he woke up. I slowed down to a fast walk when I reached the lobby so I wouldn't draw attention to myself. I faked a smile as I walked past a different guard than yesterday. "Good morning Miss." I nodded and made my way outside. I flagged down the first taxi I saw and jumped in. I gave him my address and tried to hold myself together, I would have plenty of time to breakdown later. For now just concentrate on what you have to do. I shut down.

I was moving on autopilot now, one foot in front of the other. I paid the driver and flew onto the sidewalk and up the stairs. I went straight to my room and crouched on the floor beside my bed. I felt around for a few seconds before my fingers found the hole in the fabric of the box spring. I found the edge of the duct tape holding the box in place and yanked it down. I pulled off the rest of the tape and threw the box on my bed. Mechanically I went to my closet and found a carry-on sized duffle bag and started yanking a few things off the hangars not really seeing what they were. I just needed enough for a few days anyway. I grabbed some underwear and socks before grabbing my winter coat from the hall closet. I headed for the door before turning back to the living room. I gathered up all the pictures and with shaking fingers removed them from the frames. I took all the pictures from the fridge too, just to be safe. I snatched my laptop off the coffee table and all the DVDs Jared had given me. At least I would be able to keep a piece of him. I threw everything into my bag and opened the door. I took a final look at my home before I pushed my sunglasses on I closed the door behind me.

I pulled up my hood and flagged down another taxi and jumped in. "Where to Miss?" "Vancouver International please." I took the lockbox from my duffle but my hands were shaking so bad it took me a few tries to get it opened. I flipped through the contents before I found what I needed. I removed one of the passports and the matching I.D and one of the smaller stacks of cash. I transferred everything to my wallet, switching out the current I.D I was using. I let my head fall back against the seat and closed my eyes. Just keep moving.

We pulled up to the departure area and the driver wished me a good trip. I tried to fake another smile but it came out wrong. Instead of going inside I crossed the road and headed to the parking garage. I looked around for a place where I could be finish this uninterrupted. Finding a dark corner I crouched down and pulled out all of Bree Smith's I.Ds. I lit the end of one and let it catch before lighting another one. As I waited for everything to burn I took out my cellphone and sent Jules a text. I told her I loved her and that I was sorry. I told how much she meant to me and how much I would miss her. I took the battery out and crushed it along with the phone under my foot. Soon all that was left of the girl I was was a pile of ashes. I rose and headed back the way I came, this time into the terminal. I searched the departures for somewhere new. Finding what I was looking for I went to the ticket counter. She took my passport and I.D. "Any bags to check Miss Jones?" "No, just a carry-on, I'm only going for a few days." She made small talk about how beautiful it was there and about the weather. I kept up my fake smile and replied with enthusiasm. She handed me back the documents and my tickets. "Have a good trip Sarah." I thanked her and headed to the bathroom. I hung my winter coat on the back of one the stall doors before I went to wait for my flight. I knew it would be taken or turned in lost and found. I wouldn't need it where I was going.