Let's Pretend My Tears Are Raindrops

Chapter 37--Let's Pretend My Tears Are Raindrops

Mmmk. I know they've been getting short. But....If I ever actually published this there'd be A LOT of editing! My chapter lengths would be more even and many of them would be combined. Sometimes they're just short because I feel like I've found the perfect spot to end them. Thanks for reading and let me know what you think!

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Chapter 37

     I scrambled to pry myself from Derek’s arms, but I couldn’t. “What happened?” He kept saying followed by, “Don’t make any decisions, just sleep on it.”

     However, I refused to hear any of it. Bryce was in trouble and Mrs. O’Connor needed me. Maybe I was the reason this had all happened. If I wouldn’t have left this would’ve never happened and Bryce would’ve been just fine. I knew I had to do something about it, but Derek simply refused to let go of me.

     “Let me go!” I struggled.

     “Tell me what happened.” He insisted.

     “Let go of me.”

     “Please, Sam.” He tried to get me to stop squirming.

     “I have to go back to Utah, Derek. Bryce is in trouble and I’m never going to get there if you don’t let go of me.”

     He was quiet for just a moment as he contemplated the problems we were facing. “Take me with you.” He whispered finally. I thought about it, but quickly made a decision.

     “No.” I shook my head, knowing my old feelings were pouring back in. The memories, the loss, everything. “I can’t do that to you.”

     “It would be okay, I promise. I can help you through this.”

     “I don’t need you.” I lied.

     “But I need you.” He murmured in my ear.

     “Why?” I screamed. “What am I to you? Did you just want to mess with me because I’m fragile? Did you just waste your time because you knew you’d get to see the ground fall down around me? Does it excite you to hurt people, Derek? Because it sure seems like it.” I sneered wickedly.

     He went pale and his arms dropped from around me. With a single glance behind me, I took off running.

     I sprawled up the stairs and threw up in the toilet. My body was quivering inside and out and I was so nauseous I could hardly breathe without the pain going to my chest. I was losing everything I’d come to know and once again my life was being shredded to pieces. If I stayed I’d never be able to live with myself. My mind was made up.

     “Sammy?” My mom knocked on the bathroom door again.

     I leaned over the toilet and gagged again, but this time nothing came out. I’d thrown up everything I could’ve and there was absolutely nothing left in my stomach. I supported my head in my hands and tried to lift my body up.

     I couldn’t.

     “You’re gonna have to get the key.” I said weakly.

     “Just hang on, honey.” My mom said. I heard her footsteps disappear down the hall and I collapsed on the floor. I wasn’t unconscious, but almost wished that I was.

     Tears were still streaming down my face while I considered my words to Derek. He hadn’t deserved any of them, but I didn’t know if I’d ever have the chance to take them back. I suddenly heard the sound of the key turning in the lock and knew my mom was coming inside. I tried to sit up, but I was still too dizzy.