Princess?

Chapter 44

Five Months Later

Camilla's P. O. V.

I am now five months pregnant and I'm showing. People still think it's Louis' baby and I'm so thankful he doesn't deny it.

Julian and I aren't having a sexual relationship right now. It's hard because I love him and he loves me. But he was willing to take a step back for me.

There's a ball tonight because we're hosting lots of people for lots of meetings with Louis.

Louis and I had our coronation. We are now officially King and Queen of France. It's insane to think that I'm a queen.

***

"Announcing King Louis and Queen Camilla of France"

Everyone claps as we walk in. I look around as Louis starts talking to different men.

I see Julian with a girl and I frown. It's wrong for me to do anything about it. I'm the one who told him we should take a break.

But the woman he is with is absolutely gorgeous. She's still slim and not pregnant. Her ankles aren't swollen. She's beautiful.

Julian is going to marry her and have children with her and not care about myself or our son.

That's right. I'm having a son. Louis was upset that I'm having my first son with someone other than him and so am I.

Louis walks over to me, wrapping his arm around my waist, "What are you looking at?"

"Who is that woman Julian is with?"

Louis looks then sighs, "That's Rose MacClare. She's a very wealthy and sought after woman in England. "

I bite my lip, "Oh. That's nice. "

Louis laughs, "I know you're upset. It's okay. You don't need to hide it from me. "

I shake my head and grab his hands in mine, "How are you so understanding and tolerating and lovable?"

"Because of how much I love you. Now, cmon, let's dance. "

I follow Louis out onto the dance floor and start dancing. We're dancing when someone knocks into me, forcing me to fall down.

Louis bends down with concern written on his face and Julian comes running over. They both help me up and Julian says, "Camilla, you should go to your room and get in bed. That fall could've hurt the baby. "

I nod. Louis says, "I'll come with you!"

I shake my head and kiss his cheek, "You stay. You need to entertain our guests. Give everyone my apologies. "

Julian grabs my hand, "I'll come. Cmon"

Julian and I walk to my room, going inside and shutting the door. I change into my nightgown and get into bed.

Julian sits next to me, "Are you alright?"

I nod, "I think so, thank you. You can go back out there. I'm sure Rose MacClare would love a dance. "

I refuse to meet Julian's eyes as he says, "Are you jealous?"

I shrug so he continues, "You're the one who said you wanted to take a break. "

I groan, "I know. But that doesn't mean I don't love you or that I don't want to be with you. I just felt like I owed Louis to put some effort into our marriage. "

Julian sighs, "I have to date. If I don't, I'll be lonely and people will get suspicious. "

I mutter, "But does it have to be with someone so pretty?"

Julian laughs, "You're kidding right? Darling, you're the most beautiful woman on this earth. Don't feel like you need to compete with any other woman. Because there's no competition."

I shrug, "Thanks. Rose has a lot to offer a man. You could get a fresh start. Move to England and marry her, start a family. "

Julian sets his hand on my growing tummy, "Why would I do that when my family is here? My son and the woman I love are right here. I'm not going anywhere. "

"Julian, I'm so sorry this happened. I'm sorry you're tied down here now. Eventually, you're going to get tired of being with a woman you can't marry. Being with a woman where the whole relationship is a secret. You'll want a normal relationship. Eventually you'll find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. "

Julian sighs, "I'm going to be honest here, okay. Yes, this is hard for me. Knowing that people will think our son is Louis'. Pretending that we're not together. Not getting married. The thing is, people are going to gossip and get suspicious if I don't marry. "

I bite my lip, "You want to marry someone."

It's not a question. It's a statement.

Julian sighs again, "I want to marry you"

I groan, "That's not possible. Look, if you want to pursue a relationship with Rose MacClare or any other woman that could potentially lead to marriage, tell me now. Then our only relationship will be that we share a child. No more romance. "

Julian nods, "Okay"

"Okay what?"

Julian looks at the ground, "Okay let's break this off. Okay that I'm going to pursue Rose MacClare. "

My heart drops and my voice comes out in a whisper, "What"

Julian looks up at me, "I'm sorry. But I can't live like this anymore. Goodnight, Camilla. "

He gets up and leaves. I change and crawl in bed, crying myself to sleep. I love him. I know I basically convinced him to leave me. But I love him so much.

Sure, I want him to be happy. And if he's happy with someone else, then fine. But I wish I was the someone that could make him happy. I'm going to miss him.

I love him.