Sweet Surrender (Book 2)

Dilemma

"Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for."

-- Bob Marley

Stacey

Tyler is being half-carried by Jonathan to his car. He is super drunk. I can't and shouldn't talk to him when his head is not in the right place. The air is cold so I grip my coat tighter against my body. I keep my head down as I keep on walking.

"Can you drive?" Jonathan asks as I open the passenger door for him as he helps Tyler in. He almost passed out when he abruptly stood there earlier when he heard my voice.

"Yes. Thank you Jonathan." I grin at him and nod my head. He nods back and I climb to the driver's seat. My face is wet from my tears. Tyler? He's right beside me, sleeping like a baby. Groaning and mumbling words that I cant even figure out.

"Stacey...." He mumbles but I keep a straight face. I need to be calm. I am driving his Lamborghini. I have to be slow, I'm not used to these kind of cars. He twists and turns in hi seat, his seatbelt keeping him in place.

"What have you done Tyler? What have you done to us?" I whisper silently as I wipe a tear from my face. I don't know if he can remember what he did tonight. How he broke my heart. But I know, I will remember every single thing that I saw tonight. The way that whore straddles her, the smirk on her face when she saw me. The way Tyler held her, enjoying the moment. I shake my head lightly, keep a clear mind Stacey. Keep a clear mind.

I park the car and move to the passenger side. How can I bring this man up to the house? I should've asked Jonathan's help. Instead of whining, I pull his arm to my shoulder and help him out of the car. We stumble a little as I try to carry half of his weight to the house, to our bedroom. My eyes burn from hurt when I saw the tangled sheets of the bed. The bed where he promised his love for me. Promised that he will never leave me.

I lower him down to the bed, taking his shoes off. He turns to his side. I just look at him. My dam of tears is opening up again.

What if he can't remember what happened tonight? Should I just act like nothing happened? Should I confront him? I sit on the side of the bed, thinking. Am I ready to let him go? But I love him. I love him too much. I know he's not aware of what he's doing when he's drunk. Should that be enough to forgive him and forget what happened tonight? Is this all worth it? I rub my shirt as I cry silently, trying to ease the pain that I feel in my chest. I take a look at him, how beautiful he looks when he's sleeping. Am I ready to open my eyes in the morning and will not see this handsome face of his? Will my heart be ready for the emptiness that I would feel?

I take my coat and boots off and place it on the table. I walk to the bathroom to get a washcloth and a basin of water. I look at my face in the mirror. I look horrible. My face is red from crying. Even my eyes are bloodshot and my lips are swollen. I wash my face with water before I go out of the bathroom.

Tyler is on his side. I take his shirt and pants off. Wipe his body with the warm washcloth. My eyes burn as I fight my tears. My heart feels heavy. I don't know what to do. Maybe I should call Jasmine. She's gonna be furious. I should figure this on my own. I can't keep on asking my best friends for help every time something sh*t happens to us. I have to put on my big girl shoes and figure this out.

I change Tyler to his fresh shirt and boxers. I can't sleep. My eyes hurt from crying. I feel him stir I close my eyes, afraid that he might wake up and see me crying. He turns to his side and I let go of the breath that I was holding. I know what to do. I grab my phone and send Jonathan a text.

'Jonathan, its Stacey. Can you do me a favor? Please don't tell Tyler about what happened tonight?' It took a couple of minutes before he replied.

'Yes Ma'am. I'll try to keep my mouth shut as long as he wouldn't ask.'

'The other guys didn't see what happened right?'

'I don't think so. But they are aware of what's happening before you came.'

'K. That's fine. Thanks.'

'Anytime.'

I don't know if I'm doing the right thing, maybe I'm just too afraid to lose him again. I don't trust anyone from his staff, especially that b*tch Vanessa. I can feel the threatened glances that she gave me earlier when I warned her to stay away from Tyler. I know I sounded stupid, I was even surprised to hear the fierceness in my voice. I know she understands how furious I am with her earlier. She just walked away and went for the other guys who are as horny as she was.

I put my phone back to the side table and pull the covers to my chest. I sigh loudly as Tyler moves to circle his arm around me and pulls me closer to his side. I don't know if I can sleep, but I guess I have to.

I open my eyes to the squinting rays of the sun from our windows. I don't know how long was I able to get myself to sleep. All I know is, my eyes feel swollen and burn from crying last night. Everything from last night played back in my head. I force back the lump that's building in my throat.

"Good morning." He whispers in my ear as I move to get up.

"Hmmm." I just answer as I move out of the bed to the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and I look as bad as I feel right now. I bend my head down to fight back the tears.

"Hey, you okay?" I startle as Tyler circle his arms around my waist. How come I didn't hear him walk to the bathroom?

"Yeah. I'm good." I nod my head and clear my throat as I try not to radiate the hurt that I feel to my surroundings. He turns my shoulders so I face him.

"Stacey what happened!" I jump when I he speaks louder than I expected. Horror in his eyes. I know he is confused. He never saw me like this. I didn't even expect him to see me like this.

"Nothing. I slept late. No big deal." I try to smile as I move away from him and walk out of the bedroom to the kitchen. I need coffee. I need my shot of caffeine today.

"Nothing? You like sh*t Stace! Look at you." He says as he follows me to the kitchen. I keep my back on him and try to keep myself as calm as possible. I wipe a lone tear that escaped my tear ducts.

"I'm okay. Really. Coffee?" I smile as I turn to face him. My eyes burn.

Can I do this? Can I really ignore what happened last night? Can I put the thought aside? The thought that he cheated on me?

Can I really?