and i'm alone
i want to say again but theres
nothing different about
the emptiness that has been
possessing me for years
sitting at the piano for hours
and vomiting up halloween
candy and strawberry vodka
downing water bottles
and power naps
stressing over school
and wanting to fucking die
but its not new
theres nothing new, i've always
felt this way. i've learned to hide
it better but i'm sick of trying to
conceal the fact that
i'm not okay
but it's fine, and nobody knows
and nobody needs to know
and i don't confide in anybody
but myself and the fucking
internet and it's sick and it's
eating me alive but i can't stop
just like i can't put down the blunt
and i can't put down the shot glass
and i can't stop texting you
and all of these things have
become home to me