Endure (Bellarke)

Chapter Sixteen

Bellamy's POV

He hated her, but he still cared for her. Possibly a little too much.

"Everyone stays back at camp!" called out Bellamy, and ordered for everyone to not panic about the Exodus Ship. "We'll check it out first thing in the morning. Right now, we need to prepare for the Grounders and their arrival!" Bellamy gave people an uplifting speech, giving  people hope and promise. People nodded in agreement, some going to sleep while others went to help the ill.

Bellamy went to the devastated blonde, scooped her up and carried her to her tent. He didn't know what he was doing, his mind was a mess. He wanted his feelings towards her to go away, but he couldn't help but be by her side. He couldn't make up his mind about what he wanted.

She was crying on his shoulder, holding him tight as he walked towards her tent. She still had the illness, he didn't know why she was out of the drop ship, but he shouldn' of been thinking about that when there were bigger problems to deal with. He didn't care if he caught the sickness, he just wanted to touch her, to hold her, to be with her.

Bellamy opened the tent flap and propped her on the make shift bed. He sat on the edge of the bed as he stroked her shoulder, watching her curl up into a ball. Her illness was getting better, tears made of  blood hadn't poured out of her eyes, unlike it did to some of the infected. Clarke practically crawled onto Bellamy's lap, and burried her head on his shoulder. Her arms were coiled around his neck, wounded tight as if he was going to leave her.

Bellamy's heart started to race again, he had not expected Clarke to act like this. He expected her to be stubborn and hard headed, just as usual. But witnessing her mothers death made her vulnerable. He hated seeing her act like this.

"I didn't say goodbye," Clarke mumbled into his shoulder, her face pressed into his shirt..

"Clarke-" Bellamy whimpered.

"I never told her that I love her. She died thinking that I hate her because of what she did to my dad and-"

"No Clarke. She knows you love her," reassured Bellamy.

Bellamy expected for Clarke to fight back against his statement, but instead she tried to control her breath and grasped onto Bellamy for dear life, curled up in his lap.

He tried to remember every bit of this moment, the way his face felt numb, his heart pounding rapidly, his hands shaking as they touched her back. He took in every feature he could possibly embrace, the way her eyes pressed shut, the little creases her forehead made when she was in distress. The way her hair perfectly framed her face, the little birthmark near her lip.

He didn't want this moment to end. But he couldn't help but feel guilty about what he had just done with Courtney, or whoever it was.

Bellamy didn't know what to say, usually it was easy to talk to the other girls. But with Clarke, he felt tongue tied around her. He slowly sat up from her bed, holding her in his arms. He gently laid her in the bed, pulling the covers over her.

Clarke clutched onto him tightly, "please dont go," she whispered in his ear, her lip slightly brushed his ear, sending a feeling of thrill throughout his body.

"Princess, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else," he assured Clarke, but it sounded like he was trying to convince himself.

Clarke scootched over in her makeshift bed and Bellamy lied next to her. He didn't know if he was supposed to lay there with her, or if she waned him to cuddle with her and comfort her. He felt so uneasy, he was so unsure.

Thankfully, Clarke shifted so her back was pressed against his chest, instinctively, Bellamy coiled his arms around her waist, holding her close.

After a few minutes of lying in the darkness, Bellamy was still wide awake. Thoughts were racing through his mind about the girl who was fast asleep next to him. He wanted this to be a continuous thing, to fall asleep next to her, but he knew that even though she was in distress and just needed comfort, he didn't deserve any of Clarke. He just fucked some random girl for crying out loud! He didn't deserve Clarke's attetion, and he sure as hell didn't deserve to be lying next to her.

Before he spaced out into a sleep, he thought to himself and wondered if falling in love wasn't a bad thing.

Clarke's POV

When she woke up that morning, she flickered her eyes open to realize that someones strong arms had coiled around her torso, holding to her tightly. The warmth of his body radiated off of him, heating up her body. Someones legs were wrapped with hers, intertwined together with her cold feet pressed against his legs for warmth.

She slightly turned her head to notice him, the boy who she had fallen asleep with in the arms of him. His eyes were glued shut, lashes were long and cheeks were red. He seemed so relaxed, he seemed so different compared to the day before. His hair was tossled in all directions. She analyzed the freckles that were mapped out across his face, mostly on the bridge of his nose and his cheeks.

There wasn't a doubt that Clarke had developed some sort of feeling towards Bellamy, but there was some sort of fear that was mixed in as well. She knew that Bellamy had a lot of one night stands, and she wasn't fond of that. Clarke didn't want to be in this love trap until she was sure that Bellamy wasn't just playing her, like he did with many of the girls in the camp.

She didn't want to be a victim.

At the same time, she couldn't help but push away all of these realistic thoughts and enjoy the moment as it was. Until she realized the whole reason why he was here in the first place.

All of the memories from the night before hit her all at once, and quickly realized that Bellamy was here because he was comforting her...

Because she had just witnessed her mother's death.

She slowly sat up from his grasp and pulled away.  She put on her boots and rubbed her eyes a little, which were swollen from the tears she had shed the night before.

"Princess" a raspy voice mumbled from behind her, making her heart skip.

Clarke stood up and peered out of the tent flap to see if the camp was awake yet.

"Clarke, what are you doing?" mumbled Bellamy as he rolled over to his side to watch her.

Clarke kept thinking about the possibly of being one of his many victims, even though she told him to stay with him that night. "We should probably check out the reckage. See if we could salvage anything."

Bellamy gave a confused and then a serious look, understanding what she was talking about. "Clarke, you're still sick. We need to make sure you're okay-"

"I'll round up a group, we leave in ten." Clarke gave an assertive nod and left, leaving Bellamy alone in the tent.

A/N

It's been years since I've updated this story, sorry for the wait.

BELLARKE FLUFF EVERYWHERE

Honestly this story doesn't even make sense anymore, there's no  flow to it. I'll try to get this story back on track.

-stupidspacewalker