Allie invited me to dinner one night so I tagged along. The night went on as usual until we stopped at my room. I had to witness, from behind a door, Allie telling Tristen the best friend rules and regulations. Even I couldn’t stifle my giggles. After Allie made Tristen basically run away, we headed towards her room. She opened the door. I could immediately tell something was wrong. A strangled cry came from Allie and she dropped to her knees as an overpowering smell of iron washed over me. I looked forward.
“Holy shit!” I whispered. Mr. Waters was slumped over in his work chair, fresh blood still pouring from a slit across his throat. The sobs that had wrecked through Allie’s body suddenly stopped as she passed out. I stumbled towards her and drug her outside the room. I ran back in, determined to help Mr. Waters in some way. Part of me knew it was too late but the other part of me told me I’d hate myself if I didn’t try. I knelt down beside the chair unable to avoid the blood that now soaked the knees of my pants. Taking extremely small hysteric breaths I placed my hand on his neck to see if he was alive.
By the time I accepted that he was truly gone my hands were slick with his blood. I ran outside the room and fell to my knees in the hallway creating stains on the floor. I looked through my tear blurred eyes at my hands, and it sank in. I wrapped my arms around my stomach and dry heaved repeatedly. Another pair of arms found their way around me. I looked up to see Tristen’s panic stricken face. Ridge was beside Allie. He looked at me questioningly.
“Your dad…” I choked out before dry heaving again. Tristen rubbed my back and Ridge’s eyes traveled to my hands. He stared for one second, then bolted into the Waters’ room. I heard him let out a roar of anguish. Allie started coming to again. Ridge stumbled out of the room and knelt beside Allie and pulled her into his arms. She sobbed but Ridge looked defeated and empty. His eyes snapped to me again.
“What did you do?” he said, pointing an accusing finger at me and stuttered. I knew he only thought I had something to do with it because of the blood but the jab still hurt.
“I was just trying to help,” I whispered helplessly. Allie whispered in his ear and he turned his attention away from me. Tristen scooped me up in his arms and started down the hall towards his room.
“I have to stay with them,” I said numbly.
“We have to get you cleaned up,” he said back gently.
“I tried…” I whispered before burying my face into his chest. When we got to his room he brought me into the bathroom and helped me peel off my layers of clothes down to my under garments. He then started the shower and asked me to get in. After he left the room I did as he asked. I meant to take a quick shower but I was almost mesmerized at the pink tinged water flowing down the drain. I dug my nails into my palms so hard that they bled too; my own tears and blood mixed with Mr. Waters’.
I snapped myself out of it and scrubbed myself until I thought layers of skin had come off. I stepped out and found a pair of Tristen’s stretchy shorts and a sweatshirt lying on the floor. I put them on and let the scent of him soothe me before walking out. I may not have been completely collected but I knew how it felt to lose a parent, and even though losing Mr. Waters broke my heart too, this wasn’t about me. Ridge and Allie needed my comforting.
When I walked out, I quickly told Tristen that I’d explain things later. He pulled me into a quick hug and kissed the top of my head.
“Thank you,” I said with a forced smile before pulling away and finding Allie and Ridge.
Over the next couple of days things calmed down. There was a type of funeral service and Mr. Waters was cremated. Allie seemed… calm. Accepting. I’m sure she didn’t feel that was inside but I was trying my best to keep her distracted and Fane was helping a lot too. Ridge seemed to have sort of disappeared. I knew he always came back but we never really knew where he went. We just figured that he needed some alone time. Mrs. Waters had the toughest time but I could tell she was powering through it for the sake of her kids.
I knew things would never feel normal again but by a week after January 23rd I knew things were as normal as they were going to get.
