poems

My Angel From Hell (Why if I)

I refuse to be broken
This is my token
Of the life I thought I had
Have I driven myself mad?
I've already broken
In sorrow I'm soakin'
Wishing for the life I had
This is making me all too mad
Please the tears stop making me sad
I don't want to shake so bad
But when you're numb
You wish you were done
And finally see the tears falling
Down but your life is calling
Will you be free or cry on forever
From your life your string sever
I chose to fight
Now I don't know what's right
I can not see light in this world
Through my eyes my thoughts are hurled
I can't sleep a wink
I can't even think
Why didn't I end it so long ago
Is it because I want to see snow?
It couldn't be love
Because the one up above
Has sent me an angel who
Saw a better companion they knew
I'm in love with a ghost
Who's loved me the most
And an angel from hell
Who wishes me well
But can only comfort with words

Quit toyying with me!
I know you can see!
Why do I hide
On the inside?
I'm driving myself insane!
By choosing to fight
I thought I was right
But now I don't know
If it's only for show
Or if bleeding would help
Or just make me yelp
I'm mad and I'm sad
From one day I'm glad
That the curtens have drawn away
But if then why do I stay
What can I say

I just can't remember
Who near December
I became

I don't want pitty
I don't want to cry
And I don't want to die
But other than pride
And others outside
I don't have much reason to stay

I've said all to say that in one day
My life ended and was torn away
I want you to know that although
I chose to stay and I'll love you alway'
I don't know how much longer I can stay

I chose to fight
But why if I can't tell wrong from right

I'm no soldier
But I will hold 'er

That is to say
To see you smile or see you laugh
Will keep me on Earth one more day.