This Is My Story.

Made Of Glass.

29/11/15

I heard your voice today.. For the first time in 15 days.
I wanted to cry as soon as I heard you speak, the tears were in my eyes, they were ready to fall, but I brushed them aside, because I couldn't make this about me, I had to concentrate on you and how you were feeling suicidal.

You said it was just a question, that it didn't mean anything at all, but asking if things would be different if you didn't exist, that is suicidal.

You tried to explain why we couldn't remain friends, that it's better off this way.

Other people can do it, so why can't we? How can you just shut me out, and pretend you're not in love with me.

You told me that you're stressed, your head is a mess, your doctor upped your dosage of Prozac, because you're completely falling apart.

You worry about everyone around you, but you don't worry enough about yourself, you need to take the time, sit back, and focus on you.

You said you felt guilty, for pushing me away, you said that you're worried about me, but you don't have to be, I know I'll be okay.

Worry about yourself, because I know that no one other than me is going to.
But I can't help you anymore, because you've decided that you and I are through.

I'll always be here though, whenever you feel like you need me, I'll try my best to help you, to see if I can set you free from your pain and misery.

I know it's going to take time, for you to even speak to me, I don't blame you though, maybe we just weren't meant to be.

I know in my heart I don't believe that though, because I only ever felt free when I was with you.

Now I'm locked in this cage, feeling heartbreak and misery.

You still hold the key, I know that much is true, if you just turn it slowly, I know my burdens will be set free.

I'll keep holding on, even though I shouldn't, I'll continue to love you, even though I shouldn't, I'll care about you always, and keep you close in my heart.

I'll look back in a few years time and remember the beautiful girl that captured my heart.

Please don't worry about me though, it'll take time but I know I'll be okay.

Focus on you, because you're fragile and like holding a crystal glass, once it drops it is shattered, and no amount of glue could fix you.

I've juggled you for two years, you have some cracks, I can see them clearly, you are damaged, but you are still useful.

Focus on yourself, don't let yourself fall to the ground, come to me and I'll help you, remember that I'll always be around.

If you need me to hold you, because you feel like you're falling, all you have to do is ask, and I'll be there, even if it means crawling.

I'll see your cracks have gotten larger, and the liquid is starting to seep through, I'll do everything I can, to stop yourself from losing you.

But you feel like you can't depend on me, only you believe that to be true.
But just know if you ever feel like running, I'll be here with my arms wide open, waiting for you.