Within My Mind I Suffer

Breaking the Rules

Alex POV

I lightly rapped on Fawn's door and waited for a response. When one didn't come, I peeked my head in and saw that the room was empty. Of course she wouldn't stay in here. She hates staying inside. I mentally kicked myself and started towards the garden. 

I finally got there and saw her arms wrapped around her legs. There were tears in her eyes and she stared blankly at the grass. I sat down next to her and began ripping at the grass as she just silently cried next to me. It hurt me to see her this way, but if I tried to get her to talk, she would only raise her walls again. I felt completely helpless and my face slowly turned into a scowl. More blades of grass were murdered as I felt my frustration rise. Within minutes, the grass around me was completely gone. 

"What did the grass ever do to you?" A small voice asked and I jumped. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear Fawn stop crying and shift towards me. 

"Ah, ugh... how are you feeling?" I asked, rubbing my grass stained hand on my scrubs. 

A bitter smile twisted up the corners of her mouth. "Shitty." She looked up at me with her bright and stunning amber eyes. "Does your offer still stand?" She asked, slightly blushing. 

"Wha... what offer?" I stammered in confusion. 

She gave me a frustrated and then defeated look as I felt thin arms wrap around my torso. I looked down and saw her head on my shoulder. My arms instinctively lifted up and I just sat there, looking down at her with my mouth gaped open.

"I just want someone to be here for me." She sobbed. "No one was there for me when I was raped. No one said 'It's not your fault'. They just sat me in front of the t.v and told me to forget about it. They were more concerned about keeping it a secret than trying to actually help me. So please Alex," Her voice broke and she sucked in a ragged breath before continuing, "Please be that one person that says 'it's not your fault'. Please be that one person that makes the tormenting memories go away." She clutched onto my shirt and buried her face into my shoulder. 

I hesitantly wrapped my arms around her and then tightened my grip as I pulled her onto my lap. I stroked her hair as I rested my head against hers and told her it was not her fault. That I would always be there for her. We stayed like that until she stopped crying and eventually fell asleep. I stood up and walked towards her room. I stared at her the whole way there and smiled to myself as my heart swelled with joy. She finally trusts me. She can get better now. My smile turned into a wide grin. I opened the door and set her down on the sheets. As I tried to leave, she grabbed onto my shirt even tighter.

"Please don't leave me." She whispered as she looked up at me with wide, terrified eyes. 

"Never." I promised as I loosened her grip.

She smiled contently and whispered thank you before closing her eyes. I looked at her tenderly for a little and then left. 

~*~

Fawn POV

I was brusquely woken up by drawers being opened and then slammed. I sat up and looked around, seeing two nurses putting my clothes that my mother dropped off some time ago into a suitcase. 

"What are you doing?" I questioned, getting up out of bed and taking out the clothes she was putting in.

"Please Ms., don't make it more difficult than it has to be." She begged.

"I don't care. What the hell are you doing? Am I going home?" I asked hopefully.

"Far from it." The other one remarked coldly.