The Marauders: Year One | #Wattys2016

An Invasion of Privacy

An Invasion of Privacy


Remus was missing once again.

Lily stared at his empty place in Charms the next morning and once again found herself wondering why Professor Flitwick wasn't addressing the fact that one-fifth of his First Year Gryffindor class was missing. After that great production of a speech he'd made the first day of term about the Gryffindor class being such a small one that not a single mite of mischevious activity would get by him, it seemed most unusual to Lily that he really didn't notice Remus's absence. Clearly, then, by deduction, Flitwick was aware of the missing student and simply not calling attention to his skivving off.

Lily looked over at Sirius and James, her eyes narrowed with suspicion. There was obviously more to this disappearance thing than anyone was letting on and she was quite tired of guarding the secret as Dumbledore had requested without a good reason why. Last they'd spoken about it, the boys hadn't known much of anything about Remus's disappearances, but perhaps they'd learned something more in the mean time? ...a girl could hope.

When Charms let out, Lily rushed into the hall to catch James's arm by his robes and bring him to a stop. "Where's Remus?" she asked.

James shrugged, "Dunno, do we?" he said, "Not anymore than you do."

"Didn't he tell you?" Lily pressed, "Didn't you all ask him last time?"

James's face was blank with a clueless expression. "Well of course we asked him," he said defensively.

"Well, what did he say?" Lily asked pointedly.

"Said to stop being a nosey git," Sirius said, appearing out of no where at James's side, intervening before James could answer.

"You stay out of this," she said, "I'm having a conversation with James, not with you."

Sirius grinned. "Oh, I see." He nudged James, "Look at that, James, you arent't even on the Quidditch team yet and she's already changed her tune about fancying you." He winked.

"Ugh!" Lily dropped James's arm, which she'd forgotten altogether that she'd been holding at all, and pushed by him and Sirius, "Nevermind," she said, "I don't care about Remus Lupin enough to sit here and listen to your nonsense and wishful thinking." She stomped off down the corridor, leaving them behind.

She only just barely heard James ask, "What'd you go and do that for?"

A few moments later, and two floors up from the Charms corridor, on her way to Transfiguration, Lily was still infuriated by the boys and reciting to herself all the nasty things she should've/could've/would've said if she'd only had a moment longer to think... She heard a low whistle and her name hissed. "Psst... Psst! Lily!" She turned to find Severus peeking out from a boys' toilet. She paused, glancing behind her to be sure the other First Year Gryffindors weren't right behind her, and walked over.

"Sev, what are you doing?" she asked.

He beckoned her into the toilet and she stepped inside timidly with a couple more glances behind her. The moment she stepped into the room, Severus pushed the door closed behind her quite hard and pressed his back to it, wedging his sneaker against the frame to keep it closed should someone try and come in. "I need to talk to you," he said, still hushed, as though he thought someone might be listening in. "It's very important."

"Well I'm on my way to Transfiguration," she explained, "I can't really talk right now. McGonagall hates when we're late to class and -"

"Lily, I did it," he breathed.

Despite herself, despite her need to get to class, Lily found she couldn't help but be utterly transfixed. "You did?" she whispered back. Something about the announcement that he'd successfully read somebody's brains seemed to call for the lowered tones. "Seriously?"

Severus nodded, "Yes. Last night. In the Great Hall."

Lily stepped toward him, excitement thrilling through her. "How?"

"Well, just by reading the books and really concentrating hard, I suppose," he said.

"Whose mind was it?" she asked nervously, hoping it wasn't her own.

"Some Hufflepuff's," Severus lied.

Lily at once breathed a sigh of relief. She turned away from Severus and paced, "That's incredible," she said, admirably. She paused, then, and turned to look at him. "You must be really excited."

"I am," he agreed, nodding. "Lily, you know what it means, don't you? It means we can do anything!"

She raised an eyebrow, "Do anything?"

"Well with an ability like this – being able to control it and read people's minds as I want – it could make me quite... quite powerful," Severus said. "I could use it, you know, as leverage. The things I know from hearing people's minds. People will do anything to keep their secrets."

Lily thought about what he was suggesting for a moment, imagined a mighty and powerful version of Severus Snape, like a ruler, standing a top of mountainous peak, a self-proclaimed god, the gateway to all the secrets in the world... "That doesn't sound very noble," she said, "Not like a good sort of powerful. The bad sort. Like Hitler or somebody."

Severus looked taken aback by the comment. "What?"

"Using people's thoughts against themselves as a weapon," she said, "It isn't very nice, is it? Nor is it fair. It's... it's an invasion of privacy, really."

"I'm not talking about using it against good people, Lily," Severus argued, "Just against bad people. They have it coming anyways, if they're going to think terrible thoughts, then they should have to answer for them, shouldn't they?"

Lily shook her head, "Haven't you ever had a terrible thought before, Sev? Something you wouldn't want anybody at all in the world to know about? Something very, very private?" She looked at him with pleading eyes, wanting so badly for him to understand what she as saying. It seemed so very basic a right – having one's own mind and the things that one thought in it to oneself. Why couldn't Severus understand how awful it would be to invade someone's thoughts and then use what you found out against them?

He shrugged, "Sure I have. Everyone has, haven't they?" he asked. "But that's exactly my point. I'd do anything to keep my darkest thoughts a secret, and so wouldn't anyone else. Lily, that's where the power comes from, don't you see? Because if we know a really powerful person's darkest secrets then we have control over them and --"

Lily shook her head.

"What?" Severus asked.

"It sounds like a rubbish way to be, that's all," Lily answered. "If you're powerful, it should be because people under you trust you to lead, trust you to keep them safe. Who wants someone leading who's just a sneak under it all?" She looked directly into Severus's eyes. "Sev, you're better than that, I know you are."

Severus didn't know what to say. He leaned against one of the sinks and stared at the hardware.

"I've got to go to Transfiguration," Lily said quietly. She touched Severus's arm. "Promise me you'll really think about how you want to use your ability before you go using it in the wrong way. Promise me you won't go seeking power in the wrong places, in the wrong ways." Her green eyes were wide and bright and impossible to refuse.

"Promise," Severus mumbled.

"Thank you, Sev," Lily replied. She smiled, "Now get on to class or wherever you're supposed to be!" Her voice was playfully scolding.

"I'm on free period," Severus answered. "Good luck with McGonagall. Sorry I kept you late."

"Bye, Sev."

"Bye."

Lily rushed out of the boy's toilet, checking to be sure nobody was in the corridor before she stepped outside, and ran out to the Transfiguration classroom. The door was closed, and she hesitated outside, wondering if she ought not to just skive off the whole lesson, but she remembered that McGonagall had said today would be an important lesson, and she took a deep breath and pushed her way in.

The moment the door opened, McGonagall stopped talking, mid-sentence, pointing her wand at a diagram of a conch shell on the blackboard. She lowered her wand and held it in her palm, watching as Lily walked between the mostly vacant desks to her usual seat in the front and sank into place. She felt Sirius, James, and Peter's eyes on her as well.

"Well, Miss. Evans," said McGonagall, her Scottish accent particularly sharp today, "I am very pleased that you have finally chosen to join us in this classroom."

Lily felt her cheeks turn red.

"Sorry," she muttered.

"Tardies do call for detention, Miss. Evans, and so I shall be spending some time with you on Saturday next, five o'clock, my office..." Having doled out the punishment for the crime, McGonagall turned back to the black board.

Lily looked around again to confirm that Remus had not magically appeared and then she asked, "Well hold on now... Why do I get a detention for being tardy when Remus Lupin isn't even here at all? When's his detention?"

McGonagall turned slowly back to face the room. "Mr. Lupin's punishments are none of your concern, Miss. Evans," she replied.

"Well I'm just confused, I suppose you could say, that Remus Lupin is absent multiple times since the start of term – in more than one class, mind you! - and I've never once heard of him having served a detention. Me, I'm late by a couple minutes just once and I get sentenced a detention? How is that justice?" she eyed Professor McGonagall with scrutiny. "It isn't fair."

"Again, Miss. Evans, Mr. Lupin's punishments are of none of your concern, and I recommend, unless you wish to have a second detention, that you let it go."

Lily wasn't pleased, but she did let it go – for now – mainly because of the seriousness of Professor McGonagall's eyes as she glowered at Lily from the black board. Sirius and James sniggered under their breath as McGonagall shut Lily's argument down. She crossed her arms and leaned back in her seat as McGonagall got on with her lesson, but was too angry to hear much of it.