Capturing Ella

Chapter 47 - Eleanor

I always wondered what it would be like to be a fly on the wall because that's effectively what my gift is. I can be a nosey little shit if I wanted too, but chose not to. I never liked surprises and I suppose I would say I hate surprises, getting too irritated when people try to wind me up with them. Mum was terrible for it. In early December every year she used to walk into my bedroom when I was sitting around in odd positions on my laptop doing essays, and she would just come strutting in telling me how hard it was too wrap and as I begged her to either tell me or get out, I wouldn't go out of my way to ruin anything. I wasn't that evil.

Christmas last year was pretty insane. Everything had happened in such a short period of time. School broke up at the beginning of December with the heavy dose of winter work we had to do. The benefits of living in a mountain area was when it came to December they often closed a few weeks early because of the inches and inches of snow. I think we had broke up December 4th or something because it had snowed so much in the preceding week that the school grounds just couldn't keep up with maintenance. I still had my insomnia then, and I managed to do the two months worth of work in three nights and considered myself a free human with no educational ties from the 7th December onwards. I had a few days to do the things I wanted to do – read a good series of books, Skype Michael a bit more than normal and go for my five hour long swim as it used to tire me out so much I would fall asleep for three hours, a rare banquet of REM for me.

But everything turned good and sour at the same time. Bare in mind, I hate surprises. Trace called me up telling me there was hours going unused at the police station for a night shift doing the same hours he was. I had a soft spot for Trace. Really, I had a soft spot for all my brothers in different ways but Trace's soft spot emigrated from when I was first adopted. There was about a nine year age gap between us – yeah, he was twenty nine at the time and I was twenty – so when I was adopted when I was five, he was fourteen. I guessed he saw the severity of all my illnesses as a kid and he always used to be the one, joint with Uriel, to come and settle me back down into bed when I woke up crying. He used to read me my Disney books and just listened to me not make any sense when my broken mind tried to explain what had happened. Because I was so young when the crash happened, I didn't understand object permanence or corrective perspective. I guess I never had corrective perspective as I lived my life as a poltergeist-like being, observing things from flying rather than through my living body and explaining things from a third person point of view. So I kept questioning the crash, asking when will my parents come back or my brothers and sisters pick me up from ballet class or whatever. Trace was the one that, every night, had to explain to me that my brothers and sisters and my parents weren't coming back but it was okay to remember them.

Trace and I were relatively close, but the closeness was tricky to keep up over Whatsapp messages. I didn't mind volunteering to work the same night shift he did, knowing it would be a good time for our monthly catch up. As I clocked in at nine at night, he was near enough called away to investigate some youths that were mugging people. I was meant to stay at the station for my own safety.

I didn't.

The second I was left alone I decided to go out for a wander, putting on the winter's coat that Mum had brought for me but I only ever wore to appear human. I aimlessly paced the streets of Denver, watching the night life come alive across the city. I then had a sudden urge to check up on Trace – so I did. I quickly closed my eyes and projected myself to his location and surely enough I observed the wonderful and glorious moment he met his Soulfinder Diamond. Sighing, wondering if I should pretend to never see this or admit to snooping, the biggest question I have to ask myself I managed to sit next to Crystal on the pavement when she was mugged. I pulled an un-amused face as they made out of the sidewalk in Denver. I realised I was projecting strong enough for Crystal to see me – wondering who the Hell I was, why I was a ghost and more importantly why I look so unamused. I was never a fan of public affection and thank for Lord's above that Joe wasn't either.

I don't think any of us were meant to know that Crystal was Xav's Soulfinder, or that any of the events that happened in Venice were going to happen but that's just a prime moment. Christmas was hectic because of the events leading up to it; Diamond and Trace's wedding to which (somehow) they got me to be a Bridesmaid too and wore the absolutely horrific yellow and white dresses (not that I would admit that to them any time soon – but Crystal and I had to laugh over it. Somehow, she managed to escape the "angelic" dresses,) meant they were on their honeymoon come Christmas day, with Karla and Saul also still in Venice due to their second honeymoon. This led to all the kids being home Christmas day with no supervising adult.

Thus, little Ella was a fly on the wall and was getting the most incriminating evidence humanly possible on everyone to use as levage. One has to do it when they have siblings. I saw what everyone got up too that Christmas and still blackmail them with it now. It was all joking, though, I would never be that harsh and I deserved anything that came my way. But when people are like "I would love to be a fly on the wall," I always sit there and think do you? Do you want to know secrets so big you can't keep them to yourself but you have too? Do you want to appear that nosey?

But by being nosey I knew a deadly secret, whispered vacantly over my head as the doctors spoke about me. The deadly secret was that the chances of me surviving this ordeal were minimal and they had already put in a word for preparation to the hospital morgue.