Capturing Ella

(Releasing Joe) Chapter 67 - Joe

November 21th

The night slowly dragged itself on as I pretended to sleep next to my fiancée. She was fast asleep, laying on her right side, one hand on her ever growing baby bump and the other holding the duvet up to her face, her slightly parted lips resting unperceivable against her hand as she breathed gently. Honestly, the only word I could use to describe Ella was beautiful, like an innocent model. Even just looking at Ella calmed me down, and was mainly confused as to how she was so calm when this pregnant. The due date was brought forward at the twenty week scan to the 18th January, so was just over a month away now. We had finished everything but I as shitting myself as I realised I knew absolutely nothing about how to raise a child. I knew absolutely fuck all. I've read book after book on what to do when Ella's in labour, and know all the practises of how to raise a newborn but did I know what to do when the baby was here? Nope!

There was a slight issue in the way. When the small security bomb went off in Cornwall, which now seemed like a distant memory, I had burnt my arm quite badly – second degree – when I poured vodka on the motherboards in the electrical outhouse then set it alight. I didn't move quickly enough and got my arm caught in the flames. They gave me tablets to fight any infection but I forgot to take them in the worry for Ella. Sure enough it became infected by under the new layer of skin that formed so I didn't notice. The infection took to my blood and headed towards my lungs making in incredibly hard to breathe and was wheezy. I didn't tell Ella, not wanting her to be scared especially with the baby due so soon. So I had started booking the appointments at night when Ella was fast asleep. I've had six so far and she was still sound asleep after each other. I had been taking the medicines religiously and had started to feel myself and tonight was the last appointment and hopefully get the all clear.

The alarm on my phone started vibrating and I quickly turned it off. Ella mumbled something, adjusting how she was lying and I hesitated.

'Joe?' She whispered and I knew she was barely awake.

'Yeah hun?'

'What was that?' She muttered.

'Just an email,' I lied, 'Go back to sleep baby.'

'Oh, okay. I love you,' She whispered and was straight back asleep. I dipped into her mind and saw she was already heavily asleep and was partially thinking of me and the baby. Smilingly gently at her, I kissed her temple before wiggling out of bed slowly so not to disturb her.

'I love you too, Ella,' I whispered, getting changed into a fresh pair of jeans and sticking on a jumper, bracing for the cold bitter winds the end of November storms bring. 'I'll be back soon,' I whispered to her, kissing the end of her nose before walking out the room, closing the door to our bedroom quietly behind us feeling the wave of guilt that always passes me when I'm doing something behind her back.

A few weeks ago we moved into our new house that would be ours for God know's how long and it was perfectly. Large and spacious but it felt completely right to be here I walked forward onto the landing, past the bathroom and hesitated outside the babies nursery. Gently I pushed open the door and smiled as the room greeted me.

Ella wanted to have one room especially for the baby for her nursery, and when she grows up we could just leave it if we wanted another kid at some point in the future. Not only that, she wasn't a fan of the gendering of colours and forcing societies strict gender rules among our daughter, I wasn't either if you was wondering, so the idea of painting the room baby pink for the girl was out the window the second our mothers suggested it. Instead, Ella asked me if she can paint the whole room without me seeing and reluctantly I agreed. So I said I would be away for two days when I had to travel to Scotland for a conference with Ella's brothers from America whilst she would stay and do the nursery. I came back, expecting a cream room with no furniture but my God was I wrong.