Lewis' Book of Reviews and Writing Advice

Review on "Dreams"

Welcome back, Ink Jars! Today we shall take a brief break from our usual studies--but not for long don't worry. Did you all notice we're almost at one THOUSAND reads? I am quite proud we've gotten this far!

Anyway, today we are going to do something we have not done in a while...a REVIEW! Now, now, don't get too excited! This most certainly does not mean you will not receive homework!!! Let's begin.

Title: Dreams

Author: @Hurricane_Erica

Genre: Teen Fiction

Number of Parts: Four (on going....NOTE: Yes, if you have been with me a while you know I generally try not to review books which are ongoing or unfinished, but I felt like you guys needed an assignment, this author was earnestly searching for advice, and I wanted to write something different again)

Description:

So far, the "book" is composed of two one shots (which are usually anything from two sentences of dialog to a few paragraphs). Each of which is written from the perspective of--technically speaking--the author. They were both about little romantic moments caught in paper. Whether they're true or not, I will not reveal, you must read it and see.

Thoughts:

1.) Pretty good descriptions of emotions and situations I thought

2.) Interesting one shots

3.) The chapters are really short. For those of you who know me, I prefer short chapters as I think many others do. They help the reader feel like they're accomplishing something. At the same time, this could be a problem too. I have found (now, this is just me here. I cannot speak for everyone) but sometimes, chapters less than five hundred or so words that alternate POVs can be very confusing and they tend to disconnect the reader from the character and scene. Another way to look at it, is as if you're being jerked around in a chair, between places where you want to get off. At one place you want to rest and at the other you want to eat. And JUST AS you believe you're coming close to doing one, you're whipped back to the other. And so on. The chapters in this journal/book are alright in my opinion, however.

Things for this author to work on:

1.) Splitting up dialog and paragraphs. No matter how short the story is, it probably shouldn't be one solid paragraph or several large ones. I probably broke this rule above when I ranted about the lengths of chapters. Did you, as the reader, find yourself skimming my description? Food for thought.

2.) Even though, the author is only setting up a one shot, I believe the opening sentences of both scenes could have been given better hooks. Like I said though, since it is a one shot, it probably won't discourage people from reading it. It's more of a polishing method.

3.) If you haven't read the book, this point may not make sense, but it must be seen to. The author will name each of the secondary characters and place a little * next to the name. This probably should have been stated in the very first chapter/introduction. Otherwise, it was a little confusing.

EXAMPLE: Conner* Lewis* Steve*

4.) Some of the main male character's lines seem a bit unrealistic, but this is titled "Dreams" and is under the category "teen fiction." Therefore, this fourth point cannot be held against the author too much. Besides, she knows her characters better than we might. But generally speaking, the reader should know WHY a character does anything.

Thank you, dear Ink Jars, for reading this review. Now, HOMEWORK TIME!!! No running away or swiping to the next page, Miss Smith. Here's your assignment: You need to go read this short story. Comment and vote for it. Obviously give KIND words, but make sure you actually give real advice and commentary. As a writer, I know how frustrating it can be when no one will provide their honest opinion or tell you anything "bad" about your works. How are we supposed to grow if we don't KNOW? Anyway, this is one of the only chapters where my personal opinion shines through, I hope this does not annoy you Ink Jars. I will expect to hear from Miss Hurricane_Erica about the helpful advice you have given her.

Also, feel free to write your comments below. Obviously, repeat them on her book, but definitely add your voice to the conversation. I may add your comments into this chapter to provide examples to other readers, considering reading it.

If you are interested in having your short story reviewed, let me know. ALSO, if you're wondering, I still do prefer books to be completed, however, if you inquire in the correct way, I may just bend the rules.

Your faithful writer, Lewis