7, 504 miles

01.04.2016

8.17

i just bought groceries!!!! like actual adult groceries like greens and pastas and sauces and fruit and oats!!!!

i also look real cute because im wearing my cobain inspired converse and my sliver shirt. yes!

i was super distant earlier today. i get jealous really easy.

8.30

today i was very irritated. the first thing that annoyed me was the fact that i was running late and i didn't have time to brush or dry my hair and put on makeup and i was hounded for both. like don't you think that its fucking bullshit that i have to wear makeup every day or else this agency will get upset at me for not having it on? i don't fucking need makeup. the thing that pisses me off even more is that if i was a guy they wouldn't make me wear makeup. what the hell man.

the second thing that pissed me off was at a casting. i had to change into some clothes and take photos- they didn't even like me so they gave me back my card- and when i was done, i wanted to change back into my clothes so i changed in front of two guys and i was in my bra and underwear and you could tell they were getting flustered like are you fucking 12 years old? like really guys you're both in your underwear and i'm not doing anything.

anyways, good stuff also happened to me today. last night i left a simple comment complimenting my favourite nirvana account and i woke up to a follow and some nice comments from the page. i was so excited. the person running the account said i was rare for liking nirvana, built to spill and sebadoh and i had a cool feed and awesome outlooks on kurt cobain. kickass!

in addition to this, i bought those cool grown up groceries. spent like 700 taiwanese dollars.

lets talk about cobain. kurt would never commit suicide. he's too loving and pure and smart to do something so wrong. he'd definitely try more than once but he'd never do it. he'd cut himself and self harm and shit but he would never kill himself- especially after he found the love of his life (courtney, the she devil who killed him) and had his beautiful little girl which he was so genuinely happy with.

important footnote: kurt once said "holding frances in my arms is the best drug in the world." he was head over heels in love with that child.

kurt had so much fucken that love it was popping out of his chest!!!!

papers of alphabet samples have been found in kurt and courtneys place (i highly imagine that they were from courtney practicing kurts writing style to stage the suicide letter to buddha) and courtney told the police officers to check one specific part of the house in california where kurt was lying dead. man what the fuck!

he loved the people around him too much to leave them! even though he was in a coma shortly before he died he could not have killed himself. courtney is psychotic. not to mention completely burnt out.

i texted kay this morning about my outlook on kurt's death and she replied to it saying "I admire your genuine care and outlook on Kurt cobain and I agree with you even though I am at no level of Kurt cobain knowledge."

11.00

i am beginning to think that people are becoming genuinely concerned with my mentality and wellbeing.