7, 504 miles

01.22.2016

4.23

imagine how rewarding it would be to curb stomp your enemy while wearing light up shoes #bucketlist or some shit.

"we have romantic fantasies about what dying truly is"... you know that dan and phil have taken over your life when you almost write phantasies!

yesterday i went on the roof and realized i had locked myself out. what a nice twist. "how would you describe nirvana?" "with a twist of lemon" i love kurt so much.

i just got back from the shoot for Milk magazine. i wore a lot of chanel and they gave me a good lunch so it was a great shoot.

i love my brother. he's so fricken cute. miss that kid.

"IS JOSH THE BACKUP VOICE IN AIR CATCHER BECAUSE FUCK IF HE IS IM CRYING hes such a good one in glowing eyes aw what a smol precious bean i luv him sm!!!👶🏼💕" me in one sentence.

footnote: its raining and my phones all wet but whatever.

just the thought itself of going to a twenty one pilots concert and being in the same room as my idols is making me way too excited. i'm going to be able to sing to their songs WITH THEM! LIKE FOR REAL! how great. magical. love my boys. proud mom.

when i get home i want to draw more and sing more and play guitar religiously and cut my hair and 12 DAYS DAMN I AM SO THRILLED!

5.23

i want to eat but what do i want to eat you know?

i think that tyler hasn't been feeling too good recently and that makes me really worried and sad and why the fuck is he sad he doesn't deserve that bullshit he's a precious poet angel baby with a heart of gold and he's too special for this world stop making him sad.

8.40

girls who act nice and then turn really fucking cynical when you do something wrong by accident or say something or make a mistake are my least favourite people ever like at least if you're an asshole then i know off the bat but if you fake being all nice and then fucken make me feel like an idiot then fuck you so much!

anyways, my friend is leaving which is making me sad because i want to leave, too. i wish i was the one leaving. i'll be here for another two weeks. thats honestly so depressing to think about even though its not really that long, it feels so far fucking away.

9.05

i'm crying uncontrollably now because barbora's gone. she was so nice to me and we shared so many great moments. i miss her so much already.

she left a postcard under my bed with a note on the back of it and a pair of socks for me. she told me this as i hugged her goodbye and said that she didn't want to say the word.

yesterday i went with her to elephant mountain and then to a little store full of cute things and i pointed out this pair of socks with Kiki from Kiki's Delivery Service and those are the ones that i am holding in my hands right now. honestly when i saw them i cried like ten times more intensely.

the note is what really got me, though. i read it and realized that this is probably the last time i'm going to see her and that makes me so fucking sad. i had actually stopped crying but me writing that last sentence got me going again.

in the note, she wrote:

"To: Mermaid Megan
From: Yea queen Bee

❤️ Tomato + Mushroom = Yummyiy ❤️

Dear Meg, I hope you can read this because this paper is weird to write on. I wanna thank you for showing me how to make hot chocolate and eating a lot of sweets with me. You are such a special girl, nothing can break you! Please don't be smoke u will have yellow teeth and that's unusual for mermaids. I'm glad that I met you but sad that u r sad. Don't be sad! Your family will loves u and u will see them soon. I wish you the best in life, enjoy the concert of your favourite band!

Love & hugs, Barbora from Czech Republic. P.S: YIY!"

she's one of the sweetest people i have ever met. i love and miss you, b.