Don't Let Me Go

Blame

I wake up and the first thing I notice is Scott never let go of my hand. He had pulled the chair next to me while I was falling asleep but he didn't switch to the recliner all night. He looked uncomfortable since he had just put his head on my lap and stayed on the chair. 

I realized I was yet brush my teeth since yesterday morning and I gently untangle myself from Scott making sure I didn't wake him. I just wanted to be alone for a few minutes before I woke him. Gasping from the pain, I hobbled to the bathroom sort of regretting I hadn't waked Scott to help me walk. Once I was in the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror seeing what I looked like for the first time.

I didn't recognize the pale girl with the dark circles under her eyes. She looked like she hadn't slept in days. Her lips were slightly swollen and split on the bottom. There were bruises dotting her cheekbones and scratches on her cheeks. I keep looking to see her throat has bruises forming a perfect guide for a choke hold. I looked at her not knowing who she was but knowing how she got this way. I can't bear to look at her any longer. Her dead eyes showed no emotion and the scariest part is she looked just like me.

I turn around accepting that accomplishing any task in front of the mirror would be impossible. Just as my hand was about to open the door I freeze and I hear my father's voice through the door.

"YOU!" I could hear the absolute hatred dripping from that one word.

"WAKE UP! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WITH HER NOT ASLEEP!"

I hear the chair get knocked over and I knew my dad had lost his patience. I couldn't walk out now... My face would probably lead him to killing Scott if he isn't planning to already. 

"Mr. Argent. I'm sorry! She wa-" Scott clearly was confused seeing as he just got a rude awakening but my father didn't care.

"I. DON'T. CARE. YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN WITH HER!" 

"I know.. I-I didn't want to-" Scott's voice was shaking.. He believed my father was right.. He was wrong it wasn't his fault it was mine..

"I TRUSTED YOU WITH HER! YOU SAID YOU WOULD PROTECT HER!" My father was yelling way too loud considering we were in the hospital. I heard a loud crash and I figure my father threw the chair to the wall. This was going too far.

"Dad! Stop it's not his fault!" I had ran out of the bathroom yelling at my father. I froze at the sight of Scott cowering on the floor and my dad laughing as he looked down at him. Memories from last night came flooding back.. lying naked on the pavement as they stood and laughed at my tears and the blood smeared everywhere.

Sobs wracked my chest as I yelled, "STOP IT!"

My father immediately froze hearing the tone in my voice. I don't think I've ever sounded so weak in life. He walked towards me when he saw that I was crying but I put my hand up to stop him. He was the last person I wanted near me. I think Scott understood what triggered my breakdown. He was there with me at the very end when they were laughing at me before I blacked out. 

Scott ran towards me and wrapped his arms around me as the sobs kept coming. I didn't trust anyone but Scott. Only he understood. My father watched in silence for a minute before walking out. He never came back until it was time to leave. I'd spent the entire morning in the bed crying into his arms. He didn't ask me hard questions he would just whisper to me every now and then about how much he loved me. But how could he still love me after this? 

I begged Scott not to leave me when we left the hospital. He didn't hesitate in leaving his bike behind to ride in the back of the car with me. My father wasn't happy about the arrangement but I think he realized that I wasn't going anywhere without Scott. 

When my dad pulled into Scott's driveway about an hour later I stepped out with him. 

"Where do you think you're going Allison?" My dad's voice could cut through ice.

"I'm going to spend the night with Scott." I stated without any emotion coming across in my voice.

'No. No you are not."

"Yes I am. What do you think we're going to do CHRIS?" I didn't trust this man enough to call him my father.

"You are still my little girl!"

"I'm not a little girl anymore! Any trace I had left was taken away last night!"

With that I walked as fast as I could to Scott's door before he came and wrapped his arm around my waist to help me.

Scott's mom obviously knew what happened and was being overly nice.. Although I appreciated it I didn't want everyone to know and treat me like I was made of glass and paper.