Peddie One Shots

Scars

He sat in the boys bathroom. There was a razor sitting on the shelf and it was looking far too tempting.

Things had been getting really hard lately. He wasn't speaking to his father after discovering he wanted him and Patricia to break up. His mother was getting remarried to a man who bullied Eddie. He felt like Patricia must be getting tired of him by now.

He had lifted it a few times but never had he actually got to the cutting himself part. Back in America he was the cool kid who's life was perfect and something like this was unthinkable but now he felt like he had to suffer for what he was doing to everyone else. He felt like with every drop of blood that fell, someone somewhere would feel a little happier. He knew he couldn't cut his wrists it would be far too noticeable.

Before he knew it he was dragging the blade along his hips. He made two cuts at either side then quickly jumped in the shower.

He couldn't figure out if he was happy he finally did it or disappointed that he felt this was the only option but it was done and he could never change that. The bleeding stopped quickly and he was soon getting his pyjamas on.

Later that night he and Patricia were down in his room watching a movie. She leaned up and kissed him. It was short and sweet but she wanted more. She spun round and lay on top of him as she reconnected their lips. Her hands went to rest on his hips and he winced and the pressure was put on his cuts.

"Eddie, are you okay?" her voice was laced with worry. He nodded but as soon as her hands touched his waist he but his lip to suppress a cry. "Don't lie to me, what's up?" she didn't drop it. Again he shook his head so she grabbed the waist band in his pyjamas and rolled it down slightly.

"Please tell me that's not what I think it is," she bit her lip so hard it almost drew blood.

He couldn't look her in the eye, he was ashamed. He didn't regret it. He wanted to do it again. As he heard the sadness in her voice and distress he imagined it as embarrassment and disgust. He wanted to cut himself more. Maybe it would make her smile one day. He wasn't worth her, he wasn't worth anyone.

"Babe? Look at me," he couldn't ignore the pleading in her voice. "Why?" was all she asked.

"Because my dad hates me. Because my mum hates me. Because everyone hates me," he cried.

"That is the biggest lie I've ever heard. Your dad loves you, he just isn't too fond of me. Your mum missed you so much she needs someone to fill the hole in her heart when you go. Everyone in this house cares about you. I freaking love you with all my heart. I couldn't imagine my life without you. I couldn't imagine ever being happier with anyone else. If anything ever happened to you I wouldn't ever recover. People don't hate you, everyone loves you."

"I'm holding you all back. You would all be better off without me" he was getting upset now. Why couldn't she see everyone would be better off if he never existed?

"Without you, what would I be doing now? I'd be getting continuously raped by Rofus or Senkhara would've got me or Amutt would've devoured my soul. Superhero side of you aside, you're the reason I get up in the morning and you're my last thought before I go to bed. If I never met you I

would still be miserable. My life would be pointless. Can't you see that I live to love you?"

"What about when you're sick of me, I'll never be able to let you go, if I never existed you could be out having so much fun," this was the first time he had ever thought about ceasing his existence.

Maybe it would be easier if he never existed he thought. Nobody would be forced to spend time with him, when he came here at first it was clear that nobody really wanted him. Patricia had made it clear for a while that she strongly disliked him. Maybe she was only dating him out of pity. Maybe she only said she lived him because he said it first.

"Look weasel. If you ever say anything like that again you might just drive me into depression even considering life without you. I'm never going to get tired of you and you're adorableness and cute comments or remarks. I certainly will never get tired if hugging you and kissing you and trying to tell you just how much I love you. You're probably the best thing that's ever happened to this house. You're a complete and utter doofus but you are my doofus and if you ever say otherwise then I don't know what I'll do. That time we where apart- that was the worst time if my life. You don't actually understand how much I missed you and how I craved to hug you again. If you ever do that again, I'm doing it too. If you feel pain, I'll feel pain. If you think it's the only way, then there's nothing else for me to do. I can't lose you. I'm not strong enough to lose you. If you go I go. Can't you see that?" she pleaded.

"Yacker I promise I won't do it again," he whispered as he stroked her hair.

"You have to swear," she stuck out her pinky. He locked his with hers and shook there hands.

"So you're not leaving me?" Eddie muttered curiously. She shook her head definitely. "I just thought with cuts on my body you would think I'm repulsive," he whispered so quietly he wasn't even sure she heard.

She scooted away from him, this started to confirm his suspicions. She bit her lip as she looked as him. She looked down at his hips. The four cuts didn't change how she felt about him. She knelt down in front of him and kissed each cut tenderly.

"I'll love you no matter what you look like or what you do," she smiled, "it's what's in here that counts," she continued and pressed her palm to his heart.

"Thanks Yacker," he mumbled before enveloping her in a. Hug and kissing her head.

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Turns out this one was done early! I know it's maybe not what all of you hoped for but it's done and I'm quite proud of it. One of my best friends used to cut so it was really hard for me to write about but I needed to do something to let people know that cutting yourself is never the only way and if people really love you, it won't change their love.

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Sibuna !