To Live Again: The Road to War {Lord of the Rings Fanfiction}|

27. Allegiance

I lean my weight through my palms and into the seemingly fragile rim of the wooden bucket. The early dawn light gives my reflection a ghostly grey glow, as I peer at myself in the cold wash water. It is times like this that it suddenly hits me - I am a thirty something ex modern mortal who somehow lucked out and became an elf, married a prince, and inherited a race of people all in one foul swoop! But, I've come to terms with that, I have embraced that...kind of. However what I failed to consider was that becoming a Mother, and being entirely wrapped up in my little family, has not helped in preparing me for this.

"Breathe Clara, breathe," I chant in a raspy sigh, before sloshing some of the freezing water over my face. Oh it is cold and completely disorientating but the sting is enough to scatter my panic momentarily. "Come on, you can do this!"

It is a good thing no one is around to hear my entirely one sided conversation, because I think I am considered mad enough. Still, the thought of entering the council this morning is causing me to seriously doubt my ability to form coherent words. I had sort of half hoped that a private word with the Kings' would be on the cards, but alas the only way I shall get my concerns over to Gil-galad is if I sit on the deciding council today. So I must seize this opportunity and not waste it, also it would be desirable if I did not come across as a naive little thing. For the love of Eru I am a Princess, and if Oropher has faith in me than dammit I can at least believe in myself for once. This is not the time to bottle it, I wanted this, and I am not going to be silenced into submission because a bunch of elder elves think I am a little child babbling nonsense!

"Ooh, I would not want to be the one on the receiving end of your internal argument!"

I blink twice, before snapping my head to spy Aradan trot towards me, grinning teasingly. Raffyn strides more elegantly a few paces behind him, and I note the serious concern on his stern face. I rearrange my clearly intense frown so that I at least appear more neutral. I grimace slightly at Aradan's easy tone and nature, and wish that I had his devil may care attitude.

"My lady, the council will soon be in session, I suggest you arrive early and steal yourself some prime seats." Raffyn adds practically, then notes my paling features with concern; "Are you well, my lady?

"Oh I think I am going to throw up," I wince and clutch my head, feeling suddenly breathless. "Go over this again with me Raffyn - who is there and when do I speak?"

"The entire gentry will be gathered, the commanders and captains of the various forces, and of course the political advisors of the various rulers," Raffyn rhymes off the well-practised speech again. The same one he relayed to me last night, and I pretty much gave me the same dumbfounded look. The Advisor clears his throat and starts speaking very slowly, again; "There will be a point for both Sinda Kings' to express their warranted concerns, at this point his majesty will deflect to you, he will allow you to speak your warning before the council."

"Okay," I squeak and clamp my arms tightly across my chest, nodding vigorously; "Yes, I understand, I've got this...yip...totally got this!"

"It is natural to be nervous Princess, it is an intimidating environment and your training is substantially limited, but we all have faith in you," Raffyn adds diplomatically, and bobs his head in his professional manner. Not at all helpful, but he meant well.

"Clara they are just elves, nothing more than the subjects you command in your healing endeavours!" Aradan interrupts abruptly and pulls a face. I blink at him and frown, they are not the same they are Noldor, and as if guessing my train of thought he stops me in my tracks; "Just because they wear shimmering mail, and speak like high born elite, they are still beneath you in rank Clara, all but Gil-galad and Amdir. You are a Princess, they must show you the respect they would any elven dignitary. It would be completely against their pompous ways to not hold completely to etiquette."