To Live Again: The Road to War {Lord of the Rings Fanfiction}|

28. Stay

It has been a long few days and short in some ways. Long because all I do is seem to wait on the wings, a spectator to most events. The days seem long also because of the separation from the children, every other minute I think of them and it drives me mad that I am not with them, caring for them as only a mother can. But the days have been too short, no moment is long enough to be near Thranduil, and they all seem to be slipping through my hands like sand in a time glass. Each second ticking quickly and without remorse to our impending separation, and that is the worst feeling in the world. Yet knowing that tonight is the last night I will have with my husband brings with it certain clarity.

This day of all days has both zoomed by and dragged unendingly. The council seemed to be over in an adrenaline filled blur, but the readying of the troops seems to have slowed up the day considerably. Thranduil did of course return to his duties, and I mine. I also bade my farewell to Celebrian, who was leaving early, with the King and Glorfindel, to meet with the larger convoy beyond our borders and make ready for departure to Imladris. She hugged me close and praised my voice at the council, she assures me Gil-galad will seriously consider my warnings, but she admits that there is little we can do now but weather the storm together. We vow to keep regular contact, and each of us offer sanctuary in our respective Kingdoms, should the need arise. I reckon the two of us will draw comfort from the fact that we face similar situations. It is good to know that one is not completely alone in the world.

Now that nightfall has landed upon us, I have taken a break to meander around the camp. Thranduil is not yet finished his long list of duties, and so I have a little free time to kill. Although with free time comes space to worry, and worry I do. In my aimless ambling I stumble upon another lonely figure, loitering around the burnt out embers of the nearest fire pit. Eager for some company and a happy distraction, I pad quietly up to the familiar figure and grace them with a kind smile;

"I thought King's had more important things to attend to than sitting out in the cold...daydreaming," I chuckle teasingly and take a comfortable position beside Oropher.

"I am not daydreaming, I am mulling, there is a significant difference," He answers me curtly, but gives me a sidelong glance and teeniest smirk.

"Uh huh, well where I'm from it is called brooding; honestly your forehead is going to touch your nose if you keep this up!" I sigh and roll my eyes teasingly. Oropher chuckles once before turning his full questioning gaze on me. I tilt my head upwards and with a breezy voice suggest; "So I'll tell you my burning concerns, if you tell me yours?"

"Ai Clara, I am old, I feel old and my heart lacks the same red blooded desires of my youth," He admits sadly, and kicks a bit of uplifted turf with his boot. "I have fought in wars, and I have seen carnage beyond description, I do not fear battle but I fear the aftermath of it."

"You are not making much sense," I reply honestly, but place a comforting hand on his forearm; "Dumb it down for me, or just use less riddles. It has been a testing day."

"I will miss your humour, I will miss your spark more than I care to admit," Oropher laughs a little and clamps his large hand over mine.

"In the chaos that ensured the fall of Doriath, I nearly lost Lassiel. She was nearly to term, you understand? Thranduil was born in the aftermath of war, and war has followed him ever since, his mother predicted as much. She believed the days of our birth marked our fortunes in this world. My greatest fear was that my child would be taken from me in battle, and every time he picks up his sword I cannot help the urge I have to command him to stay at home and fight no more. But war is in his blood, he was born to fight and to deny him that would break him. He is my son, and it seems to be our destiny to be a line of warriors, as much as I wish it were not."