drown × calum hood [complete]

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Chapter Ten: I'm not okay

(I promise) he just looks so cute and squishy and ugh

Dedicated to: angelichemmings bc she's awesome ❤ go check out her books

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×Calum×

Calum had been walking upstairs to go to bed when he heard it.

The faint sound of retching and then liquid splashing against liquid; a sound he knew all too well.

"Who's in here?" Calum asked dumbly, knocking on the door. No answer. Just like when he had tried to drown himself.

He tried to open the door. Again, locked. This was like déjà vû for him.

"Can -"

He heard another retching sound.

"That's it," he said to himself, starting to ram his shoulder against the door. He repeated the action about three times before being welcomed to the sight of Bella bent over the toilet bowl, throwing back up what she had just eaten.

"No, no, no."

Calum tried to pull Bella away from the toilet, but he couldn't. He was stuck there, frozen in place, staring at the girl in pure horror.

She rested her forehead against the toilet bowl and sniffled. Tears came out of Bella's eyes.

This was all Calum's fault. He had tried to make her eat all that food; he had forced her to eat it all. He had made her think that she couldn't when she could. And now she was throwing it all up.

He fliched when she looked up at him with dark eyes, so dark they were almost black.

"Please go away, Calum." Her voice was quiet and cracking and it broke his heart to think that he had caused this.

"N-no. This is a form of self-harm, Vela."

"And how would you know that?" she replied weakly.

"B-because I know. Trust me on this."

Another tear rolled down her cheek.

"Please just go, Calum. I don't want to see anyone at the moment."

Calum opened his mouth to respond, then changed his answer.

"No."

"W-why? Calum, please just go."

"I'm not going until you leave this bathroom."

"Fine."

Bella heaved herself up with a great amount of effort and clutched her stomach, her face pale.

"I'm gon-"

Before she could finish though she spewed all over Calum, his face turning to look of disgust before she shouted, "I told you I was gonna do that!"

Calum didn't want to get angry at the dark-haired girl. She was doing what he had done about two months ago. She wiped her mouth with the sleeve of her sweater.

Without realizing it, he had started crying.

"Why are you crying? Is it because of me? Please don't say it was me, Calum."

"It w-wasn't you, Vela." He said, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand.

She flinched at his words for a reason that Calum didn't understand [maybe bc you called her candle] but he was happy that she had at least stopped throwing back up the food she had just eaten.

"I-I should be leaving now," she said, pushing past him without hurting him.

"I... Okay. Um, bye, then."

"Bye," she simply replied before leaving.

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didn't really enjoy this chapter but meh

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-mahina xx

p.s. HOLLEY I CAN SEE U I KNOW U R DERE