All In My Head

Bleeding Love

I don't know why people just can't understand the fundamental rule of human beings... people change. Ethan has changed. So yeah, he messed up a few times but you have to understand that sometimes it's hard to do the right thing, when the pressure's coming down like lightning. It's like they want him to be perfect. When they don't even know that he's hurting.

'Babe, are you okay?' I hear the faint voice whisper outside my door.

I breathe in and let it go. In every teardrop there is something beautiful.

'I don't mind what your mum said about me. I'm down with it. Can I come in?' He asks, reassuringly.

'Sure.' I mumble, swallowing my tears. One thing Melody always hated about me was my ability to get emotional over everything. But that was alright. I don't care. I have Ethan. And he is all I need.

He creaks open the door and hesitates slightly before silently lying down carefully beside me like a ninja. He rolls onto his side as presses his hand against my cheek. My tears fall even more. But I don't know why.

He wraps his arms around my torso and pulls me into his body. We lay in silence for a while, allowing the silence to embody us, giving the sense of tranquillity and composure. My phone buzzes and I roll over annoyed.

'Hey Amelia, its Sabrina. Can I meet you somewhere in an hour or so?' Sabrina? How did she get my number?

'What did you want to talk to me about?' I looked around and saw Ethan pretending not to listen but there was no escaping my voice cutting through the stone-cold silence.

'Just about what happened between you and Beth.'

A pang of guilt washed over me, burning my soul and eating my insides.

'Oh. Right. Yeah. Sure. Erm... look I can't say I'll make it for sure but I'll definitely try. Just text me the details. Oh, and, can Ethan come too?'

There was a silence that smelt of pure fear and hesitation coming from the other end of the line.

'Well. Right. Hmmm. Yes.' That was worded like a statement and spoken like a rhetorical question.

'Okay well I'll get back to you in a bit. I'm kind of busy right now.'

'Cool. No problem. Bye.'

Before I could return the 'bye', the call ended. She seemed panicked. I wondered what she wanted to say to me after everything. Probably that I've done everything wrong. I always do. Would people just stop telling me that?

'So what are you going to do?' Ethan asked, sitting up and leaning against my headboard.

'What do you mean? I'm going to go. And you're coming with me.'

'But-'

'No 'buts' okay? First things first let me get ready. Give me ten minutes.'

I run to my closet and grab anything I could find that was suitable for the occasion, still cautious that Ethan was watching me from the other side of the room.

I dart into the bathroom and run out to discover that I threw on black skinny ripped jeans and an orange hoodie inspired by 'the Muppets'. I threw my hair up into a bun and tied a plain black bandana in my hair. No time for make up, so just some mascara and lip gloss. Yup that should do. I noticed from the corner of my eye that Ethan was staring at me while I applied my lip gloss and I stared right back at him.

'Damn' he said.

'What?'

'You look so beautiful in this light, you silhouette over me. The way it brings out all your curves and all your edges, makes me fall in love with you all over again.'

'Please,' I scoff, 'you're just in love with my fat ass.' He giggles like mad. 'Anyway. Come here, let me do your hair.'

'But there's nothing wrong with my hair' he whines.

'I'm just putting a strong hold gel in it to give it a collected, yet messy look.' I walk over to him with a range hair products cradled in my arms. As I set them down next to us on the bed, he pulls me onto his lap and I sit cross-legged facing him, analysing the products to see which would suit best.

As I run my hands through his hair with thick glob, his hands slide up my back and he presses his lips on mine before calmly pulling away and closing his eyes. He was still cradling me and I just had the hairspray left to do as the finishing touch when my bedroom door swung open.