Broken

5

I slept the whole way to America. I was woken up by Kegan. "Were landing in five minutes." He says as he nudges me. I opened my eyes and looked out the window.

It looked like we were over Detroit. "Ok. Alexus, I'm making one rule." Kegan began. "You are not aloud to fall in love with Ash again." "Its fine. Kegan don't worry. I love you." I say and peck him on the check.

We landed and I quickly got up to get my bags out from the cabinets above. Kegan grabbed his and we started slowly walking down the crowded esile way.

When we got out of the plain I saw a tall dark haired boy that I knew. "ASH!" I yelled. I ran to him. When I got close enough I dropped my bags and hugged him. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his face. "Hi alexus!" He says. He pecks me on the check because that's what we always did when we greeted each other.

I looked back and Kegan was collecting the bags I dropped. "Ash this is Kegan. Kegan this is Ash." They wave to each other and kegan walked to me. I jumped down off of Ash.

I ran after Kegan and grabbed his shoulder when I caught up with him. "Kegan please don't do this. Ash is my friend and we've known each other for so long. Please. He's not even the worst one you'll meet here." I say. Kegan slowly turns around. "What do you mean he's not the worst one I will meet here?" He asks. "Well. You see.... There's Billy, Dom, Giraffe, Adian, another Adian" I say but he cuts me off. "I will hurt anyone who comes near you that I don't like princess. Your lucky I don't beat ash to the ground with a metal baseball bat." I says. I nod and turn around. Kegan grabs my hand and turns me around. "But there's something he needs to get straight." Kegan says with a smirk. He leans in quickly and crashes his lips on mine for about 30 seconds. He pulls away and looks at me with a smirk still. He grabs my hand and we walk over to where Ash is standing.

As we get closer, I start to see his dispointed look. I'm sorry I mouth. We ride to his house in scilence. Kegan grabs all of our bags out of the trunk. We walk in and I see Ash's mom. "Hi alexus!" She says. She hugs me tight. "So, who's this boy?" She coos. "O sorry. This is Kegan. He came instead of my mom." I say. She nods. "Ash, go take them to the guest room." She says.

Ash leads is upstairs into the guest bedroom. Kegan Wald in the room and I go to follow him. "Tell him you need to go to the bathroom. We need to tree talk." He says add he grabs my arm and pulls me back. "Kegan, I need to go to the bathroom." I yell. He turns asylum ng and nods to me.

I walk down the hallway and walk into the bathroom. Ash folows me on. "OK. You never once mentioned that you were bringing your boyfriend. I thought you were gonna bring that Cassie girl you mentioned. I thought we could be like we used to be when you l lived here." He says.

I say down on the edge of the bath tub. "Kegan is the only one who knows about me other then you. He was the one there for me when my dad died. Not you." I said. "Well, I couldn't help that. I couldn't do anything about you dad dying!" Ash said raising his voice. "Look. I'm sorry. I thought you guys would be friends." I say. "If he lays one hand on you, I'm gonna beat him." Ash says. I stand up, unlock the door, and walk out.

Ash was protective of me. Very protective of me. I walked back in the room and Kegan was working on unpacking and sorting the cloths to go in the right draws. I walked over and started to help him.

"I don't think I'm gonna like Ash." Kegan said breaking the silence. "I know. I thought you two would and he doesn't already. Just make sure when we are around him not to like kiss me. Please. I don't mean this in like I don't love you, but he has a tendency of beating the shit out of people who touch me." I say. "So now I can't touch you?! Alexus, were dating! I should be able to show that I love my girlfriend!" Kegan yells. "Please. Kegan I don't want to get into it right now." I say calmly. "Fine I'm gonna take a nap. I'm tired go and hang out with your boyfriend." He says angry. "Whatever. Kegan you know I love you. But take your nap. Hope you have a nice one." I say as I walk out and slam the door.

Ash came out of his room. "Why did you slam the door?" He asks. "Kegan's being a butt." I say pouting. I went downstairs and sat on the couch. "My mom and dad left. They're going to Walmart." He says. I nod my head.

We sat in silence for a long time. "I don't think you should date him." Ash says looking down. "Why?" I ask. "Because he doesn't love you. I do." Ash says. He leans in and crashes our lips together. I was in shock and didn't react the way I expected. I liked the way his lips felt on mine. I didn't push him away, instead I began to kiss him back. We had a make out session for about 5 minutes.

"What a nice thing to see my girlfriend doing." Kegan says. I pull away from Ash and look twords him. "Wait make that ex." He adds. I could feel my eyes swell up. My eyes began to fill with tears. I didn't know how to respond. He shook his head and turned around. He was already crying.

"What have I done?" I asked myself. I got up and ran to find Kegan. The bathroom door was shut so I knocked to see if he was in there. "Kegan?" I asked. "Leave me alone bitch." He said. That hurt me. I could feel a tear slip out of my eye. Ash ran up behind me and said, "look alexus I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen." He put his hand on my shoulder. "Don't fucking touch me!" I screamed. Ash backed away and went back downstairs.

I walked away from the door because I knew I would never get him out. I went to the guest bed room and opened my bag. I found my razor and began to take it apart. I grabbed the blade and hid in the closet. I could hear someone punch something. I cried. In fact I began balling my eyes out. I pressed the blade against my skin. I winced in pain yet I like the way it felt. It was my escape. Escape from the world. It was what made me feel better.

I ended up cutting 9 times on my forearm. I finally got out of the closet. I put my razor back together and put it back I'm my bag. I pulled my sleeve down so no one could see my arm. I unlocked the door and walked out Kegan was on the other side of the door.

"Kegan, i-i know I did s-something bad. I-im so sorry. I-i love you." I said still crying. I was looking down so I could see his sleeve. I had red stains on it. "K-kegan?" I add. He looks down and quickly hides his arm. I start to cry harder. "Its been years since I did this last. I love you and it makes me feel better." He cried. I hugged him tight. I began to walk away but he grabbed my wrist. I winced in pain. "Alexus? Are you ok?" He asked. "I-im so sorry kegan. I know I promised you but I had to." I cried. He pulled me in another hug but this time he held my chin in his hand. He looked me in the eyes and then slowly leaned in. He crashed his lips on mine. He pulled away. "God I so damn in love with you." He said. "I love you too." I said. I hugged him again.

I pulled away from kegan. I looked over and saw Ash. He didn't look so happy. He flipped me off and turned around. "Annikas on her way over." He said. "K" I answered.

I ran downstairs and Kegan followed. "How many times did you cut?" Kegan asked.

I showed him my wrist they were all scabbed over now. "Alexus that could kill you don't cut that many times in a row." He rolled up his sleeve he barley had one cut. It was small but it was deep. "Its my first time cutting in 3 years so I didn't do it as bad." I nodded. I gave him a hug then someone knocked on the door.

Ash came running down the stairs. He didn't bother to answer the door. He went strait to Kegan. "Why the fuck did you let her cut?!?" He screamed. "Look i didn't want her to! Chill man." Kegan says. "You are her fucking boyfriend!! You know about her!! And you let her have a fucking blade?!" Now ash had he pinned on the wall.

"Look I didn't want to fucking fight with her while I was here. I had a conversation with her and she won't do it again!" Kegan said weakly. "How do you know? A broken person does not quit!" Ash yelled. He let go of Kegan and walked over to me. He rolled up both of my sleeves.

"You see this?! Huh? This is what it looks like to be broken! She's been cutting for fucking 4 years Kegan!! It will never stop. Alexus show him your stomach!" Ash yelled. I slowly lifted up my shirt to reveal my scars. I started cutting there so no one would see. I cut there when I first started.

"O my god." Kegan said covering his mouth." When I had no room on my stomach I started cutting my wrists. Kegan started walking twords me with his arms stretched out. "Look don't fucking touch her and mabey she won't cut!" Ash screamed. "Ok now you've done it! I'm probably the fucking person keeping her from cutting! I the one that's there for her! Not you!" Kegan punched him in the jaw.

"Nows not a good time! Come back later!" I yelled to the person a the door. Kegan punched him again. "Stop it!" I screamed. I walked twords them and kegan punched me. I fell back. I noticed I was crying. "O my god! Alexus i-i didn't mean to I guess- I don't know why I did that." He walk twords me. "No Kegan please don't hurt me again." I said weakly.