The Most Painful Life

Chapter 5 - The Morning After

Picture of Kurt on the side there. I kind of changed his appearence as it was previously described, because I just didn't see him like that tbh... He looks more like James Veck-Gilodi, not exactly but he's got that sort of face in my head:L

I woke up the next morning and looked around the room I instantly recognised to be Zack's. I knew I'd been drinking last night, that would explain why I couldn't remember anything. I noticed I was in Zack's bed, and remembered the kisses we'd shared last night. I couldn't help but smile. I knew it meant nothing to him, but I'd finally kissed the man I loved. Zack was snoring quietly next to me, he looked so cute. I then noticed that we were both naked.

"HOLY SHIT!" I sat up and yelled. Zack woke up and looked at me, clearly worried.

"What's up? What happened? Why are you yelling?" He asked me. Then, as if he'd read my mind, he noticed how our clothes were thrown accross the room and we were both only covered by the sheet on top of us.

"Fucking hell! How much did we drink last night? I can't believe we.. did it!" He said. I couldn't tell whether he regretted it or if it was just the shock. Memories from last night came flooding back to me. I couldn't say he disappointed me, I certainly enjoyed it. I just wished it had meant something to him, and that we had both been sober.

"I can't believe we did it!" He repeated himself. He looked me in the eyes and tried to smile.

"I can't believe we fucked! Can't say you were bad though." He winked at me, trying to lighten the mood a little. It was slightly awkward waking up next to Zack, especially since we were both naked.

"This is really weird." I said sighing.

"I know. But hey, you're my best friend. As long as we don't make this a regular thing, I don't see why this is that awkward. I mean, I love you, right? You love me? Maybe not in the way people usually are when they have sex, but surely I'm better than some random looser?" He said. He was wrong though, I did love him in that way, I wished we could do it more often, as a couple.

"Yeah, you're better than some random guy. Or even worse, you could've been a girl!" I said, pretending to be horrified. He laughed at my stupidity and gave me a hug. It felt so right to have his naked skin pressed up against my own. He rubbed my back to relax me, and I snuggled back into the bed and fell asleep again, his arms wrapped around my waist.

To anyone else, we looked like a couple. I knew it and I'm sure he knew it too, but why he wasn't doing anything about it I don't know. He'd just basically told me that he didn't like me in that way, so there was no way it was possible that he wanted to be a couple. But he just didn't seem to mind the intimacy in our friendship. I hoped that we wouldn't end up becoming friends with benefits. I didn't think I could handle the emotional strain that would put on me.

We both woke up about an hour later. I realised that my head was pounding and Zack sat up next to me.

"Hungry?" He asked.

"Not really. But I'm dying for some paracetamol." I laughed, making my head spin.

"Me too. C'mon, lets get up. You can wear some of my shorts, if that doesn't make this even more awkward for you?" He said. I shook my head. I got up, not caring that Zack could see me naked. He saw enough of me last night anyway. He whistled at me, and I stuck my toungue out at him. I put on a pair of his boxers and one of his tops. I really hoped nobody came to his door this morning, because one look at me and you could tell what had happened last night. Or perhaps I was just afraid of people finding out about what happened the previous night.

"You getting up or you just gonna sit there and keep perving on me?" I said to him, jokingly. He came out of the daydream he was in and jumped out of bed, slipping some boxers on. We both walked downstairs and took a couple of tablets to help us feel better before sitting in the living room watching more TV. We were cuddled on the sofa when I heard someone knock at the door. The very thing I was dreading.