Save me from my head
As cold tears roll down my chest
Shoulders tilted
Flowers wilted
The ones that remind me
Of everything
But I'm a hypocrite
Because I say I want to remember
But it hurts when I do
And I make myself sad
All I want is to be happy
Do I really?
God, I don't know
All I know is these tears
That I call my friends
That tear me apart when I remember
Things in the wrong way
It never even happened that way
I place demons in my memory
And letter by letter forget
Only to try to remember
Jumbled letters fill my head
In such an order
Dancing around the rings
And lining my skull
So very loud
Knees to my chest
And hands pressed to my head
So much force
Get it out, get it out, get it out
Let it out
But don't tell anyone
Shhh, we'll just pretend
It would cause a lot of damage
And that sounds fun doesn't it?
Not at all
I'd never meant it
I'd just always said it
Can we pretend I didn't?
I don't want to
The letters just tumble out
In no particular order
And only few always ring
s o r r y
Painter, save me from myself
I am my favorite flower
Beautiful and yellow
Swallowed up by you
But it doesn't matter
I'd want you to be happy
And afterward, let me hang
Your beautiful picture
There were demons in your memory
So people remember you with pity
And lots, lots of money
This is not how I want to be
Dead as a flower
But they insist on keeping you
In a shiny glass vase
Can we dance through the flowers
Together?
I'll paint you a letter picture
That doesn't make sense
To anyone but us
And I'll tell you the ones
Of supposed pity
Really it's just understanding
Don't mind me
I'll keep you in my vase of memory
Don't forget me when you leave
Think of me when you see yellow
Whisper to me through the clouds
"You're a hypocrite"
I've known this for a long time
I've known you for a long time
I'll never know me
But don't letter me to death
With your pity
s o r r y
I know you know how I feel
I line the rings and add more
And they begin to get heavy
But when I think of you
My letters drift to a different place
Of no sense and happiness
Of understanding
I know I'm a hypocrite, okay?
Thank you for telling me
I greatly appreciate it
I'm sad when I think of you
And I'm happy
And everything else in-between
What's in between my beloved
Hip bones and my collar bones?
Paint my empty canvas
With tears and shove the yellow
Tube of paint down my throat
Excuse me while I shove
The paintbrush through my head
And the letter pencil through my
Little heart
Or would you prefer it to be
The other way around?
Anything to make you happy
Let's dance to the lines
Of lining music
We use as a weapon to fight ourselves
Hello to all the hypocrites
Wave at them through the vase
Oh no, they're taking pictures
Where is your canvas?
Hurry and grab the paint
I'll letter them to death
With my beloved profanity
Only they have filters
My mouth does not
Let your whispers rain down
From the painted clouds
And I'll write them down
I'll never forget them
Will you keep me in your vase
And toss me up into the air
When you get upset
To reassure you that gravity
Still exists as I come crashing down
You'd once told me
As we were laying in the flower field
That the world has been painted
With oh so many lines
Not the letter kind
But the ones like the way
We were supposed to be
And we, the disappointers,
Were disappointed with the world
And the people there
That trapped us in this vase
Because our flowers were different
Everyone loves flowers, don't they?
But not everyone appreciates weeds
And they still wish on invisible ones
That we would simply go away
Our home is tilted
So no wonder our shoulders are too
As we stand here
Throwing letters back and forth
To pass the time
And ponder of beautiful memories
The ones that we have made
And definitely not the ones
I try so hard to forget
I push them low beneath
My collar bones
But they are like children
That run out at night
Beneath the moon light
And their laughs wake us up
Oh well, we love children, don't we?
Get up and chase after them
In a blurry haze of moon yellow
Until we are out of breath
And shivering
Why do we come to such
An abrupt stop?
Don't scream at me!
This wasn't my fault!
Please can we go back
To painting flowers?
Alright, thank you
Because it's just us here
And I don't want you to fade away
Can we letter our days away still?
If you leave you'd miss the children
It's not so bad here really
Maybe we can get married
I'll be Mrs. Hypocrite
Your sad little painting
Of a wilted dandelion
And you'll continue to bring me
All the letters I need in
So many new orders
As we grow old together
But my yellow paint eater
The one I tried so hard to make
Happy with my letters
Of understanding
s o r r y
Today, you left me
And I could lie and say
"All is okay"
I'll just place you in the vase
Of my beloved memories
But now I am unable to
Lie even to myself
I am truly disappointed
That I couldn't make you yellow
And now my nights are quiet
And the children's laughs haunt me
Our vase is terribly lonely
And the letters have come
To an abrupt stop
