Dear God

thirty three ◇ discover

"Dear God,

"Isn't it funny how two years had gone by and I hadn't talked to you ever since? Well except when I told you about the fire, that is. That was two weeks ago.

"Young minds, I guess, make stern decisions.

"Our entire house blew up and we're now staying at a hotel. Apparently it was some faulty leaking in the gas or something. I'm not too sure what the police said because I was too busy thinking about you.

"And isn't it funny how I thought about you only when I was in trouble? Kind of selfish of me, I admit, but don't you see? Silly, naive old me! Still can't get over the fact that you aren't some superhero waiting to rescue me!

"Young minds, I guess, also find it difficult to give up childhood theories.

"Although now, two weeks after that faint old tragedy, let me tell you something, God.

"I made a discovery that day. And I'd been meaning to tell you all along, but my mind was just filled with such a massive wreck of emotions, it seemed almost impossible to make my tongue function.

"Guilt, victory, confusion, then finally, joy.

"Because I finally realized that you, God, you weren't a superhero, or a person, or anything any body could possibly see.

"You, God, you lived inside of me.

"Right within my soul.

"The same voice that told me to get up when I was so close to giving up.

"The same voice that told me to stop crying when I knew it was useless.

"The same voice that helped me tell between right and wrong.

"I call you God. Others might call you instinct. And then some others would refer to you as chance.

"Because that day in the fire, if I hadn't heard that voice inside me, if I hadn't listened to you, my family and I would've no longer lived to see another sunrise.

"And perhaps you made all of this happen just so that I could realize.

"Because I have. I finally have. And I bet if mom or dad or Drew or anyone walked into this room right now and saw me crying over this in the corner, they'd think I was absolutely crazy.

"But I don't need to convince anyone, God.

"Because I've finally convinced myself.

"Remember when I told you how nobody would ever understand me in the whole wide world but myself?

"It's finally true, I know!"

_____________________

there you have it. the answer this whole story was spun around. you probably already knew, but for those who didn't, well, of course this is just an opinion.

there'll be one or two follow up chapters. i've still got to decide and as school is starting again, i'm really running out of time (and equipment!)