The Coffee Guy BoyxBoy ( #Wattys2016)

Chapter 33

*Alex's POV*

I was getting more and more concerned about Mike's behaviors. He would wake up with sweat covering his forehead, and his hand always gripping my arm, like I was about to leave him or something. He would then stand up and draw something, not letting me see it, saying I will stop loving him.

"Mike." I whispered as he ignored me, watching the television in front of us. I brushed his cheek, "Mike, listen."

"What is it, Alex?" His sharp tone surprised me, and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Mike, could you please tell me why you've been acting weird lately?" I asked as I searched for his eyes. He gulped, looking down at my hand which was placed on his thigh. It was like something was holding him from telling me, and I got more curious.

"Um-" he spoke up, glancing at me, "it's nothing."

"Oh." I sarcastically laughed, "so, telling me I will stop loving you, and waking up with sweat, and crying is nothing?" I raised my voice. This wasn't good. I shouldn't be angry and raising my voice on Mike. I told myself I had to retrain my anger towards him and try not to shout. I hate it when I loose my temper so easily and then forget the world and just yell nonsense to the person in front of me.

"You're really stupid to think this is nothing, Mike!" I yelled, making him flinch and look down at his lap. I stood up, running a hand through my curly fringe and taking a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. I heard Mike sigh.

"Look-" I gulped, leaning down to look at his eyes properly, "I'm just worried about you and it's not helping that you're saying it's nothing, because there is something. I'm really worried, you know. I just want to help, and I don't want you to suffer this alone, Mike. Please understand that."

"I know what you're trying to say," Mike looked away, "but I- I just don't want to talk about it."

"Why?" I stood up, and he looked up at me, "why the fuck don't you want to tell me what's going on? Are you afraid to tell me?! Don't you fucking trust me?"

"I do trust you, Al-"

"Then fucking show it!" I yelled, grabbing the journal I kept and threw it aside, "then fucking show me that you trust me!"

"Alex, calm the fuck down!" Mike stood up and walked towards me, putting his arms around me as I breathed heavily. My body felt hot and like it was boiling. I was loosing myself. I was embarrassed that Mike have to see me like this, all shaken up and angry. 

"Alex." He breathed out as he set me down on the sofa, "calm your tits down."

I gulped, nodding my head as I ran a hand down my face, glancing around the room. I spotted Akihiko looking at us with a confused face, its ears prepped up and eyes widened. It was probably wondering what's going on and why we're acting like this. I felt Mike move next to me and I felt something touch my shoulder, like a feather. I look to my right to see Mike giving me a sympathetic smile. I sighed.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Mike. That was-" I shook my head and buried my face inside my hand. Mike put his hand on my back.

"It's alright," he shrugged his shoulders, "I'm already used to it." I watched as he smiled, and I smiled back. His smile was so cute, you smile too. It was like a trick.

"It's getting late, don't you think?" Mike said as he looked at the clock above us, "we should probably go to bed. We have school tomorrow, you know."

"Yeah, you're right." I sighed and stood up, and both of us silently walked to our bed, not opening our mouths to talk about what had just happened a minute ago. None of us dared to speak up.

***

"No!" I heard Mike twist and turn next to me, and I was quick to wake up and try to calm Mike down. He was yelling different words that I couldn't really catch and I got anxious. The sight was kind of scary to be honest. Mike whimpered, and I shook him lightly.

"Alex!" Screaming, he lunged to me and hugged me, wrapping his arms and legs around me. I sighed and hugged him back, rubbing his back in circles, trying to soothe him out. He was breathing hard, and he was sweating. It happened again. This has been going on for like a month now, and he wouldn't tell me why it has been happening like this. Whenever I try to ask, he would either change the subject quickly or just ignore me. It pains me to see him like this. I wonder what's causing this. I really do, I'm very worried about him. His nightmares always seem so distracting and terrifying. I wonder what he dreams about that makes him in this state like right now.

"Mike, shh." I pecked his head and he breathed out a shaky breath, gulping. He rested his head on my shoulder and I'm guessing he fell asleep on me, by the sound of his light snores. I lifted him up and laid him on his back on the bed, and tucked him in. Slightly smiling, I pecked his forehead and stood up from the bed, not wanting or feeling like going back to sleep. I went downstairs, and checked the time to see it was literally four am. I grabbed a glass of water and just stood there in silence, taking a sip or two every minute.

I am going to find out what's going on with Mike, and I will make sure he's going to be safe and sound. I never want to see him in this state again, and I want him to be happy. I don't want him to think everyone hates him, I want him to know everyone loves him dearly. He deserves to be happy.