My Nonexistent Love Life

To: Those Who Like To Hear That They're Not Alone. 10/25/11

10/25/11

Hey, guys!(:

Kacie here. So Taylor was a great volunteer to offer up some of her nonexistent love life snippets and humiliations, and so sshe's going to share them with you guys, kay?

Enjoy!

WE'RE NOT ALONE IN THIS WORLD.

Hey, we can even create our own club like aliens but something else..... nevermind. heheheh

So, Taylor, take the stage!

DEAR a piece of paper,

this is my short love life summed up in a little chapter.

LETS SEE, where should we start?

Oh yes. The first day of school.

So I walk into Algebra and I'm all like "WHOO WAY TO START A FRESH NEW YEAR."

and then this guy walks in.

lets call him... Evan.

So Evan walks in and I'm all like, 'woahh.' Fixing my hair off to the side and what not... and we should describe Evan.
Evan is only about 3 inches taller then me, has REALLY blue eyes, tan, and plays football. I dunno. Just attracted to him in some way I guess.(;

Anyways, I'm all fixin' my hair and actin' all cool and what not, THEN ALL OF THE SUDDEN. BAM. He looks at me. Maybe I'm just over imaginative like someone I know (cough Kacie cough cough) and so I'm all like, just cut the stare, and so I look away and start blushing like a little fan girl cuz I think I was all cool and what not back then. I wouldn't necessarily think of myself as popular, not like the girls who are sluts... but, I'm the good popular. I'm friends with everyone and what not (;

FIRST THING YOU NEED TO KNOW. I raise goats. I have goats and chickens... and this is my tip toward you.

TIP FROM TAY; never. ever.ever.ever.ever.ever.ever get interviewed by your local newspaper. EVER. I got interviewed for winning Grand Champion with my goat, so I was all cool DL (down low) and what not and then... the worst thing happened to me that I'll let you know later.

So lets recap. Evan is guy #1. I raise goats. Pretty awesome and what not... then it slips out from under my feet.

There is also this other guy... lets call him Denton. Let's just get this straight. Here's another tip.

TIP FROM TAY: Also, don't ever date the Principal's son/daughter. Just. Don't...

So Denton and me were good friends in kinder garden, and his dad was the Vice principal. I started to gradually like him from the start of 8th, and it kinda progressed. It's not like "OMG LYK. ILY." no. It's a little crush I guess. So therefore, Denton is guy #2.

So here is where it gets CRAZYYY. I was sitting in Spanish when the normal announcements come on, said the pledge and what not. Then right before the announcements ended, my hell began.

"Taylor lastnamehere won Grand Champion with her goat Skippy at the Texas State Fair! Congratulations Taylor!"

And I felt like balling. Everyone turns to me and cracks up laughing and clapping. I wanted to go die in a hole. Then came the questions from Mason (Denton's friend), "Where do you get a goat? Can I have your goat? What do you do with a goat? Where do you keep a goat? Did you get your goat at Goats-r-us?"
And the cocky comments and questions just kept coming. And of course Denton was in that class. Just an ironic twist. And he just kinda turned to me like it was the first time he noticed I was alive.

I wanted to... gawd. I hated my school soooo much, I was pissed.

THEN OF COURSE NEXT PERIOD I HAD ALGEBRA. (BTW, this happened 2 weeks ago, it died down after a week of tortures.) And everyone was all like "Taylor has a goat? Who's Taylor? (<-- says the jocks)" And I tried to go on with my day of multiple questions. And Evan just kept glancing and grinning. But, I doubt it was a good grin... maybe a 'what a dork' grin. Until I learned a secret about Mr.Evan.

Tip from Taylor: BEFORE YOU GO JUDGING, Facebook is the key to dirty little secrets.


Later that night, I went on Facebook and what do you know, Evan's name was on my 'People you may know' sidebar. So out of curiosity I clicked on him, then went to his pictures. Long behold...

he showed steers.

For you City folks, STEERS ARE CASTRATED COWS. Make it more simpler?

Male cow= nuts cut off= steer.

Therefore, HE showed cows. HE won grand champion. And HE sold the steer for  $12,000

And I would just also like to point out, I got attracted to him more... because he is in the same boat I am. He's a cute cowboy (;;

So the next day, the front office CUT THE NEWSPAPER OUT (I was on the front page, whoopwhoop.) AND POSTED IT ON THE BIG BLUE WALL. (I was the only one up there.. feeling accomplished.) ohgawd. That was brutal too because I had some pretty ugly pictures up on that page... and it just sent the fire down the hall and burning throughout the school.

I would tell you more... but. You should be left with this little scene.

Me, Denton, this weird (I think she's lesbo... but.. who am I the one to judge?) girl, and this 6th grade friend. We got done with our project with 10 minutes left and my 6th grade friend, Fabio, decided he wanted to ask personal questions. Example, "Weren't you a tomboy in 6th grade?" And I was, but, I didn't want to say something like that in front of Denton, so I was all like, "Uh... noo..." and then he went on with,
"I thought you rode ripstick?"
"Nonono, I rode it once, went down a big hill, tried to turn and sprained my wrist. I had a cast in 6th grade..."
"Oh, well, you were quiet in 6th grade."
I just nodded, and started doodling on a spare piece of paper, trying to avoid conversation. Denton seemed intrigued and made an on-core with the show. Oh great. That was some on-core I'll never forget in those 3 minutes.

Sincerely,

Goat Girl</3 ~Tay

+End Scene+(And with a round of applause for our Taylor, whose been through SO much<3)