After You

Chapter Four

©2013 All Rights Reserved

I'm sitting in a doctors office waiting for my check up after my episode. It's been a few days since and I haven't gone back to school or home. I was still pissed at my Grandma and even a little bit at Hayden for yelling at me about going to Johns house.

Some jerkward stands up leaving all of his stuff sitting where it was charging out to answer his phone. I moved my feet back but he practically ran into me and he was ruder than anything. Fine fucker you can trip on my foot next time.

A few doctors walk by me giving me a curious look as I tapped away on my phone music blaring in my ears. My foot tapping to the beat of some rock song that was on. I didn't what it was called it was good.

"Lights gone out. Trying to find a new way around. You where gone so fast I didn't even see you leave."

Some tapped my shoulder and I looked up to see a little boy standing in front of me. I think my heart quit beating. He looked exactly like Jason only about four years old instead of six. His blond hair highlighting in the most natural ways and his green eyes staring intently at mine.

"Iz you me sissy?" I looked at him and my face softened.

"Sorry sweetheart I'm not." I told him in a soft voice.

"But you gotta be. She'd look like you. Mommy told me she not come home but here you are." I stood up and crouched down next to the young boy.

"How old are you?" I asked him I was so curious.

"I five!" He cheered in joy holding up one hand to show me he was five with his fingers.

"Well come on, let's go find your mom." At that moment I could have sworn that the doctors made a mistake that Jason didn't die. I could have sworn he was standing next to me, and we where walking hand in hand to find his mom.

We came out to a frantic blonde lady, he let go and ran up to her hugging her leg." Oh thank god you're okay!" She cried hugging picking him up and hugging her to him.

"I thought I'd return him to you." I told her and turned around to leave.

"Sissy wait!" I came to a hault as a small hands grabbed mine trying to stop me from leaving.

"Yes Sweetheart?" I asked him.

"Why are you leaving?" He started to cry.

I picked him up. "Hey kid don't cry." I whiped away his tears with my sleeve. This reminds me of what I told my baby brother the day he did. Don't think about it. Don't think about it. His mom gave me a look and I set him down. I have to remember this isn't my little brother. I had no right to be wasting his time.

"Tess the doctor is ready to see you now." A nurse in a blue nurse outfit came into the waiting room looking down at a clip board that probably had all my information written down on it.

I took my thumb and pointed to the door the nurse had just left through. "See kid I have to go the doctor wants to see me." He pouted and gave me puppy dog eyes.

"But sissy you can't leave." He frowned. His mom came over by him. "

"Come on let's not bother the lady son." She went to pick him up but he stepped away. Now he was closer to me.

I ruffled his hair."I'll see you around kid." I gave him a small smile and his mom gave me a confused look. With that I left them. My heart pounding inside my chest. That little kid pulled on a heart string of mine and I couldn't help but be sad. He reminded me of what could have been, but I killed him. He is dead because of me.