Wars Will Rage (SVU Fanfic)

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Elliot jumped up as soon as the words left her mouth, grabbing her small form and pulling her to him. How could she say that? He couldn't lose her. He loved her too much to even think about not being by her side. Fighting with her sucked, but this was the happiest he had ever been in his life. She gave him everything he ever wanted and more.

He held her hostage in his arms, not even daring to let her go. He couldn't lose her. He wouldn't take the chance of releasing her, in case she ran away.

"El..." Olivia said, tapping against his chest, but then pressing, trying to get out of the embrace. "Elliot, I can't breathe!"

He loosened his grasp a smidgen but would not let her leave him.

"Elliot," Olivia tried again, but then realized what she had said. "Elliot," she repeated, trying to get his attention, but it wasn't working.

"You can't go," Elliot whispered finally, after much silence. "Don't go."

He was so quiet, Olivia was unsure if the words she was hearing were correct, but she assumed they were. What else could he be saying? The brunette pulled her arms out from between the two of them, then put them around his middle. She rested his head over his heart, hearing his lightning fast heartbeat.

She felt like an ass. Elliot was strong on the outside, but had an external barrier that could be so easily cracked. Anyone he loved could get to him, Olivia being the easiest way to get him to break.  She practically broke off their engagement. What had she done?

"El-"

"No. Please don't leave me. Don't leave our son. Or my twins. I can't-"

"Elliot, I'm not going anywhere," Olivia stated firmly, loud enough to stop his words. She stood tall and made herself look serious, much how she did at work so perps knew who was in charge. She pulled away to look at Elliot, eyes welling up with moisture when she saw him desperately trying to hold back tears. "I-I...I didn't mean-"

"Didn't mean what, Liv? Didn't mean to say that we might as well not get married?"

"I just...I meant us yelling and fighting- we shouldn't-" she stumbled over her words. She didn't want to lose Elliot anymore than he wanted to lose her. "I don't want to not get married. I just...we need a break from each other or something. I love you so much but we fight too much for Nicole to recover. It's not healthy."

"So, a break," Elliot said, thinking it over. It wasn't the worst thing she could have said. But it could've been better. Way better.

Olivia shrugged uncomfortably, already wanting to go back on what she said. She wanted to jump up in her fiancé's arms, his strong arms. She wanted him to carry her somewhere in the house - it didn't even matter where - and lie her down on some surface and make love to her. The washing machine, the kitchen table, their bed, the couch, it didn't matter. She wanted him to take over her. She knew he loved her. She wanted to feel it.

Before her knew it, she was crying, regretting the entire conversation. She'd rather have him yelling at her at this point. She didn't want to have to make decisions.

"I'm sorry," she blubbered, desperately trying to pull closer to him. "I-I didn't- I love you. I don't-"

"Shh," Elliot said, heart shattering at the sight of her tears. Sometimes it seemed all they were good at was breaking each other's hearts, but then it was only them who could fix it.

"W-We don't have to..." she trailed off, trying to come up with the right words to use. But she couldn't. So she continued to sniffle through her tears and just looked at him, wanting him to make her feel better. Because only Elliot could do it, and that was a fact she knew to be true.

"Liv, we can't just-"

"No!" she yelled, unsure of what he was going to say. She was assuming what Elliot was about to say would be something bad, so she stopped him and then hugged him tighter, loud sobs starting all over again.

"Liv, please," Elliot said to her. "Don't cry."

She didn't listen to him and just held onto him. What had she done?

Elliot pushed her back a little, but then picked her up. She didn't care what he did with her at this point; she was trash. But she still cling onto Elliot for dear life. He set her on the counter, but kept her legs apart and stayed between them.

He kissed her, hard, the taste of her lips turning salty as her tears made their way down. Elliot held her by her face, trying to wipe her tears.

When they broke apart, Olivia dropped her head to Elliot's shoulder. Elliot knew they should take this time to talk about their problems, but he didn't want to, and he knew Olivia really didn't want to. All they wanted to do at that point was love each other, one of the few things both knew how to do correctly.

Elliot turned his head and kissed her neck. Olivia reveled in the feel of her lover's lips, wrapping her arms and legs around him. She moaned as he sucked on her collarbone, pulling even closer. She wanted him. Wherever or however was irrelevant. She needed him to make love to her.

"El."

At the weak sound of her voice, Elliot's member made an appearance. Olivia could feel the pressure through her jeans and let herself grow wet.

Olivia had enough strength in her to take hold of Elliot's head, guiding it back to face her. "Make love to me."

Pulling her off the counter, he spun her around and pushed her against the opposite wall. He kissed her even harder, starting to undo what he could of her clothing. Her shirt felt to the floor, as did his. He was too impatient to take her bra off, so he just moved it out of the way.

But all of a sudden he stopped, looking at her, with her swollen lips and flushed cheeks.

"What?" she asked.

He didn't reply, but carried her up the stairs. He wanted to love her right, not against a wall like a horny college student.

He laid her down on their bed, undoing her jeans. He slid them down her beautifully golden legs, then ran his fingers back up when they were off.

Olivia sat up to help with his clothing, freeing him quickly.

Elliot leaned over, planting a kiss on her lips. It was such a perfect kiss, Olivia felt she was in a movie, one of those beautiful girls loving another beautiful man, and a setting so beautiful it seemed fake. But this wasn't fake. Elliot was real and so was she.

Olivia reached up and touched Elliot's face, letting him kiss her some more. She let out a small laugh, "We can't just forget the last five minutes, can we?"

Elliot wanted to. He knew in the back of his mind that they would eventually have to seriously talk about things, but for now, he chose to agree. "What last five minutes?"

With that, Olivia pulled him closer, waiting the next couple of second until she felt him in her.

He loved her passionately, and it felt different to both of them. Something about this time was truly flawless. She cried as she came, not because of good Elliot made her feel but because of how she knew that though her life was currently so complicated, she had finally found her place in the world. She finally felt as if she had a purpose, that she was so fulfilled in every way possible.

Elliot came a moment later, collapsing on top of her, head on her breast. They cuddled together, skin slick with sweat. But they fell asleep, knowing nothing could tear them apart.