Bullied By Dan Howell

Part 29

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE EASILY TRIGGERED!!

PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE EASILY TRIGGERED!!

PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE EASILY TRIGGERED!!

(A/n: Hey guys. This will be another flashback chapter. Thanks again to pengirwin and abbyyypo You guys are amazing <3 ) *Bold/ Italic are thoughts*

"Let's get you home and cleaned up" Phil said with a kind smile, his eyes were twinkling. "Thanks Philly" I replied. "Anytime" he smiled. Once I steadied myself and was about to start walking when Phil picked me up and carried me. "Phil, thanks but I can walk ya know?" I laughed."I know you can but I don't want you to open your cuts any more" He said. I nodded. We got to his house and he took me up to our bathroom. He asked if I'd be okay if he cleaned me up. I of course said yes, he was basically my brother. He got a cloth and dampened it, then he slowly lifted up my shirt and cleaned the cuts that dotted across my stomach. I took deep breaths and relaxed. He bandaged the cuts and moved onto my shoulder. I winced as the clod cloth pressed against my wound. "It'll be okay" he smiled. I nodded. He finished and left me to clean my body and face up. Don't do it. Don't do it. I repeated to myself looking at the blade I hid. I gave in. I wrote a note explaining everything.

Dear Friends, Family, and Enemies,

I know this is a shock, but it's my time. I may be twelve years old and I'm sorry I'm doing this. I want to give acknowledgements to my loved ones;

Phil; Oh Phil where do I start. I love you more than anyone I've ever known. You've been there for me through everything. I can't thank you enough for standing up for me and being an amazing friend, and basically a brother. I wish i could have hugged you one last time. But the last thing you did that made my heart flutter was kiss me. I love you so so much. Please don't be sad, it was my time. Take care of yourself my love. I want you to know I love you.

Mum and Dad (Phil's mum and Dad. Emily and Aaron); You guys are amazing. You've been like my mum and dad for years since my parents basically disowned me. I love you guys so much and you're hilarious and super nice. I couldn't ask for better parents. Thank you guys for always making me laugh and smile when I needed it.

Dylan, Ava, Percy; You're welcome. You got what you wanted. Since you wanted me to die so badly, here I am, dead. I hope you guys have a great life, I say that because I refuse to go down to your level. Dylan and Percy; you guys were my best friends and I think you may know that what you did was wrong. Telling someone to go die is the worst thing you can say to a person. Have a good life.

I love you guys

-Emma

1 cut; ugly. 2 cuts; unloved. 3 cuts; stupid. Each cut got deeper and deeper. My vision blurred as I made one last deep cut. Everything went black. Finally, my life was over. I thought as I blacked out. I heard Phil call me. Then quickly open the door, revealing my body which was covered in blood on the floor. Phil kept repeating "No, come on I love you" over and over. I started to regret everything. I tried to open my eyes; didn't open. I tried to tell Phil I loved him; couldn't speak. I knew my life was over.

I woke up in hospital. I jolted myself upright. I was hooked up on machines and tubes ran up and down my bed. "Emma!" Phil exclaimed. His eyes were red and puffy and his cheeks were tear stained. "Hey Phil" I said my voice was raspy and my throat was dry. "I love you so much"he said starting to sob. "I love you too" I whispered and began crying too. "How long was I out?" I asked as I leaned over and picked up a cup of water to drink. "A week and a half" Phil told me. Percy woke up and rubbed his eyes. Phil's mum and dad walked in. "Em! You're awake!" his mum said. I smiled. "Hey mum and dad" I said happily. I knew I was loved by them. "You did it" his dad warmly cooed and kissed my forehead. His mum gave me a hug and sat down in a chair. The doctor walked in. "Emma, you're awake! We have a bit to discuss" the doctor said. I nodded. He politely asked Phil and his parents to exit for a bit so we could talk. "Emma, just know you can trust me. I'm a doctor and psychiatrist" he said. "Okay" I whispered.