" I HATE MY LIFE " Vince voice got mixed by sound of breaking glass. I ran into the kitchen and I saw he had thrown a chair through the large window of the kitchen.
His dogs were barking so loudly.
" Vince, please no, don't say that "
" Clara, please go away, please "
" No, I am not going anywhere " I crossed my arms. You have no idea how fast my heart was beating that moment.
Vincent slowly opened a cupboard and took a knife out of it.
I was so scared.
" What are you going to do? " he didn't answer me. He looked at his wrists and wanted to put the knife into them.
" VINCE, NO " I ran to him and blocked his arms so he couldn't cut himself.
" Clara, please let me!!! " he screamed, looking into my eyes.
" No, I won't let you do that "
He rushed his fists out of my hands and pointed the knife to me.
" Well, Vince, if you really want to cut a wrist, cut mine " I put up my sleeve and showed him my wrist.
" No, I can't do that "
" Don't cut yours "
He took my wrist tightly in his hand, pulled it closer to him and took the knife. He looked into my eyes and then back to my wrist. He slowly put the knife into it.
That hurt. That hurt very badly.
I didn't look because I can't handle the sight of blood, but I could feel the pain, I could feel blood dripping down my skin. I felt the knife moving on my skin. It felt so wrong at the beginning but then I started to enjoy it.
Suddenly Vincent screamed: " WHAT AM I DOING " and he threw the knife on the floor and looked at his hands, red of my blood.
" Clara I am so sorry, I have been drinking and I have been taking drugs - " what.
" Oh my god, no "
" Yes, yes, I did, but I do regret it " he cried so hard, so loud. I walked to him, but my arms around him and he put his around me. He cried. And I let him cry.
Sometimes you just have to scream everything away from you.
***
" Ray, we need a girlsnight "
" Deal "
I stopped the phonecall and made my way back home. I kept thinking about what happened at Vincent's house. I was so scared that he would do something bad to himself. I was worried. More worried than ever before.
I kept looking at my wrist. It wasn't just a cut from a knife, no it was heartshaped, with a V on the left side of it and a C on the right side of it.
I think I'm the only one he actually trusts. I think he knows that I'm there for him whenever he needs me. I know he will listen to what I say he should do. I know he loves me. And I know that he knows that I love him.
