Someday, somehow you'll fall into a trap
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SASURA
"So how was it? Are you okay? Are you keeping up with them?"
My mother keeps on asking me that every time I got home from school. How lang has she been asking me those? Oh yeah, like 4 weeks already. And I kept telling her that school's fine.
"Ma, I already told you." I said irritated.
Nakain na kami ng dinner and here she is, acting all giddy. And dad.. He's not minding us at all. Hays. He's letting my mother irritate me! What a life!
"Okay, okay. Alam mo naman na I'm just happy for you."
"Well, I'm not." I murmured
"What did you say?" She's now transforming into a monster.
"Nothing, Ma. Goodnight." I said as I kissed their cheek and went to my room.
I layed flat on my bed. I'm really exhausted. I pulled up my sleeve only to see my scars. Scars everywhere.
"It doesn't hurt."
I got up and went to change into my pj's. Still wearing a long sleeved. If I don't, my parents will see my scars. I can't let them see it. I don't want them to worry. I'm perfectly...fine.
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"Good morning! Ready to go to school, huh?" My mother said.
I'm not. I don't want to go to school anymore. I hate it there. They're hurting me, Ma.
"Not that much." I said shrugging.
I started eating. When I was ready to go to school, kung ano-ano pa binilin sakin ni Mama. Like, don't starve myself, get a high grade and everything. I felt like a 7-year-old.
I was walking down the streets again. With coffee in my hand, as usual. I chose to walk everyday than to ride my bicycle. Good thing our uniform is long sleeved. It won't be awkward for me to walk in the streets with scars in my arms.
After 10 minutes I finally arrived at school. Since I still have spare time I went to the gymnasium. I usually spend my time in there. But not in the afternoon. Players have their practice so I find a place to spend the time.
I was shocked when I opened the door. They're having practice?! I mean, they won't go to their classes smelling like that and all sweaty, right?
"S-sorry. I thought nobody was in here." I apologized to their coach. He just gave me a nod.
I was gonna run outside already but damn it! Kai just called me and I had no choice to look back at him.
"W-what?"
"I.. Uh.. Nothing." He said and looked away.
I didn't mind him and just went to the classroom. I accidentally hit my arm with my books because it was losing balance in my hands. I silently groaned.
"It's nothing." I whispered to myself.
Even though how many times I've said that it's nothing, it doesn't hurt, that I don't care. I know I'm hurting. Too much. I can't take it anymore. Ayaw ko na. I want to end this pain. And I just know how. It's just too.. risky.
"Good morning class. Raise your hand if I called your name." Ma'am Jiama said as she entered our room.
Jiama and I isn't that really close. We only see each other during family gatherings. And whenever we see each other we go talk to each other. She's still a friend though.
