The Adventures of Prudence Funk and Her Bag of Fish

17-Prudence Participates in a Burrito Eating Contest

One day, Prudence was at the park when she saw people setting up a large table and a sign that said, "BURRITO EATING CONTEST TODAY." Prudence was hungry so she wanted to participate.

Her competitors included a fat dad named Fatty Sam who loved food and an average burrito enthusiast named Janet. The person running the event grabbed a microphone and explained the rules.

"Welcome, welcome to the 3rd annual burrito eating contest! We've got a great bunch of burrito eaters today so let's get started! Each of you participants has been given a plate of burritos. When the clock starts you will all race against each other to eat as many burritos as possible. The person who eats the most burritos in ten minutes is the winner! And remember, no cursing, no harassing, no violence. ARE YOU READY?!"

The small crowd that was watching cheered unenthusiastically. There was one news station there filming the supposedly mediocre event.

"ALRIGHT! Contestants, on your mark...get set...GO!"

Prudence leaped into action, grabbing a burrito and shoving it into her mouth. Fatty Sam sped up his burrito eating and was in the lead. Janet chewed her burrito slowly and carefully because she was a wimp.

Fatty Sam continued in first place. Prudence shoved four burritos into her mouth at once and consumed them. She was catching up to Fatty Sam.

Prudence attracted a larger crowd of people. Soon hundreds of people were watching the contest.

Prudence was in the lead! She ate and ate, with cheese, beef, and lettuce falling from her disgusting mouth and onto her shirt.

Fatty Sam was catching up. But Prudence was determined. She saw her destiny in every burrito she consumed. She shoved the final burrito into her mouth.

"Time!" The contest was over. Prudence had won! She had eaten a grand total of 439 burritos! She had chewed her way to victory, even with the few teeth she had.

A news reporter went up to her. "Miss Prudence, congratulations on winning the 3rd annual burrito eating contest! What do you have to say to the fans at home?"

Prudence still had food in her mouth as she said, "I love fish, I love food, and I hate Dr. Phil! And Jeff, if you're watching this, SCREW YOU, and tell mom she's a FAT PIG!"

"...ok that's enough thank you!" The news reporter said. She walked away.
Prudence went home and threw up burritos.