I Beg You | CAPTAINSWAN AU

Chapter 23 | Don't Depend on Me

|I bet you've never read a fic that their FIRST KISS is on chap 22...

Anyways, I'm satan so ;)

TYSM for the +270 comments on last chapter.

And here is some more torture:

(Btw, something really WHOA is happening soon - next chapter)

MHUAHAHAAHAH it was one of my fav parts of the whole fic so get ready

*whispers* satan strikes agaiiiin|

She didn't know why she had kissed him.
Of course, it had been something that she had thought several times before, curiosity could be a reason to that.
Although, as she kissed him, she couldn't stop thinking on the situation that had led to his vulnerability.

His father was in Ireland.
There was a big possibility that Liam could go too.
What if Killian would go with him?
What if Killian left her?

She knew this was their last year in high school, and jeez school had just started 2 months ago and she was already thinking too much forward (as always).

Of course, when she moved to kiss him this thought didn't even occur to her mind.
It was like her brain had made the decision for itself.
An unconscious begging to not let him ever leave her.

When they finally pulled apart, she still had her eyes closed and she only opened them to look down at their laps.

Although she wasn't looking, she knew he was smiling and clearly staring at her.

"Well that was quite the comfort." His voice sounded like he had just woken up.

Suddenly she felt like she had been too much time on his lap, she was too uncomfortable and she wanted to go home now.

Her heart was still racing and she just wanted to hide in her bedroom.
She didn't know what to do now.

"Was this a one time thing?" He asked again, breaking the silence.

She was still looking down at her hands on her legs. She didn't know what to do now.

"Maybe that'd be the best but I don't want- I don't know."

She felt him sighing against her shoulder, and didn't she love it? "I've never had anyone after Milah... I'd like to try this with you." She kept feeling his eyes on her and his hand was now on top of hers. "We could go slow. I know you're new to this and I've never had a decent relationship. I want this to work so much, Emma."

"I'm not sure it will work with me." she said. He was putting too much pressure on her, like he was so hopeful to make this the best he's ever had but she knew she wouldn't be it, she'd never be the best. And she'd crush his hopes.

"Then let's make it work, love." And she didn't know why but the way he called her "love" made her see the situation from other point of view. This was her chance of having it.

"Okay." She breathed. "I don't know what to do now." She confessed a few seconds of awkward silence after.

"Me neither." She had been nervous telling him that, hopping he'd guide her in this new thing, but she completely relaxed when he started laughing, an idiot grin on his face and his eyes adorably glowing with happiness.