Step-Brothers (n.s)

11 | Harry

Spinning, I felt myself spinning. I couldn't help the constant pounding uneasy feeling I had while I stood here in the middle of the lobby feeling myself being shot in the fucking chest while I watch Niall flirt with this brunette knob. I'd love to point out all the dirty things about him, but I couldn't because I hated the fact that he's extremely attractive with brown eyes and a jaw line that could cut a straight edge.
Niall is clutching his stomach, while he laughs at something funny this minger said. My fist clenching at my sides and I feel like steam is being blown out of my ears by just watching them flirt.
I don't even know who this guy is and I don't even know if Niall knows how he is. I want to rush over there and grab Niall and just kiss him, so rough and needy that his mind will be swept of the thought of this tosser who think he can flirt with my Niall.
I sound like a possessive boyfriend, but the thing is I'm not his boyfriend and I can never be. It breaks my heart with each day goes by that I look at his beautiful face and every time we hook up, to think he could never be mine. It's quite agonizing and I feel like Brandon and Callie off of The Fosters; so in love but forbidden by the law and family morals. What I feel for Niall is so wrong but it feels so right.
When we hooked up last night I couldn't help but let myself fall deeper into this thing I got myself into. I dug this hole for myself and I may never be able to climb out.
I didn't even know I felt this strongly towards Niall, that's until I witnessed him acting so happy with another man. A man that I could never be, his boyfriend.
I felt a nudge to myself and looked over to see Louis grinning mischievously. I rolled my eyes, because Louis always seems to bless me with his presence.
"What do you want?" He is a darn meddling kid.
"Your jealous." Louis just didn't say that any normal way, he had to use his annoying girly voice that dragged out jealous. He sounded pretty gay, and yet here I am stereotyping my own sexuality.
"Sod off," I scoff and look back over towards Niall. This time this mystery guy is whispering things into Niall's ear and Niall is giving him one reaction I crave for the most from him; a smile.
Niall's smile is so bright and he could really be the sun. He is the sun, well he is in my eyes that is. He lights me up and when he looks at me, it's like a spark is being set off in my heart.
So sappy of you Harold.
I don't mean to be sappy or cheesy, he just really brings out the best in me. I know I totally show a different side of me when I'm with him, for instance; annoying, bitchy, rude, snarky, and really the list could go on. I like to hide the brightness he brings in my life and like I said, if I can't get a reaction from him in me being all nice and shit. Then why not get a reaction in another way? It's a stupid plan, but I was thirteen when I swore to myself to not let my emotions get in the way and here I am letting them get in the way.
I really need to stick to my word. It's not helping anyone.
"Why don't you just talk to him?" Louis buds. I not really in the mood for Louis' pep talks. If he wants to cheer someone up, he should go to talk to Niall. I'm sure he needs some helping trying to find a way to prank me next.
I had an idea pop into my head while I still stood here and watched Niall talk to this guy. While I began to walk further and closer to Niall and his new found friend, Niall gazed my way and smirk growing on my face. Niall's face read off a little but of worry and fear as he gulped and greeted my company.
"Hey Niall." I meet his eyes and gives him a mischievous smile before I turned to the mystery guy. "Who's your friend?"
"Harry.." Niall trails. "Meet Lance, Lance this is my stepbrother Harry."
Great Niall, just let the whole world know. Before I even get the chance to shake his hand Louis has his hand on my shoulder keeping me in my place.
"Hey Lou," Niall says.
"Hey Ni, who's your friend?" Lance, his name is Lance. Sounds like a guy in his middle forty's if you ask me.
"This is Lanc-" I really tuned out from there. Not bothered to have the motivation to sound like I'm interested.
I look up to meet the eyes of Niall, while he looked at Lance with his cheeks tinged and goofy smile on his face. Fuck I want to kiss him so bad.
I'm so zoned out on Niall that I hadn't even noticed people trying to talk to me until Niall gives me a funny look and Louis is shaking me to grab my attention.
"Huh?" I break my stare and look over to Lance who has a very entertained smirk on his face.
"Lance was just ask-king you h-how your liking Berlin so far," Niall stutters. It was quite cute how he got so nervous, but it angered me to not know who he's nervous in front of; me or Lance.
"It's a great city," I say, while looking up at him and surprisingly he's only an inch taller than me. I look away towards Louis. Louis is quietly enjoying this, I can tell by the way his features show on his face; what a prick.
I really don't want to converse with this Lance guy anymore. He was irritating me, so I turned around not uttering a word any longer. I've got to act like I don't care, it's the only way to hide my emotions.
I could feel someone fumbling to keep up with me, I only wish it's Niall chasing after me, but I know it's just Louis and when I turn around at the elevator to give one last look at Niall. He's gone and so is Lance, while Louis is standing in front of me with a very entertained stance while he taps his foot.
"Someone is jealouus." Again he's using that very annoying voice that is pushing me to my end soon. I just really want to get drunk, and maybe take one a girl or a guy.
Then I'm reminded by Rylie and if she was here she'd give me her full attention. Unlike Niall who is suppose to be here when I need a good fuck. Next time- if there even is a next time I'm definitely topping and I'm gonna make Niall regret even con-traversing with Lance. He doesn't even seemed just a little fazed by what we did yesterday and that hurt me even more just a little.
So I walked away from Louis and went straight back to my room, it's only 5 in the afternoon but I'm really just done to drink away my sorrow feelings and maybe I am a little sexually frustrated. Even though I just had sex last night, I want more.

**

I sat at the bar alone, not even caring it's still early in the evening. My mind is defiantly elsewhere at the moment. Niall hasn't talked to me all day and I feel like I've been used.
Dirty and humiliated that I gave myself to him so easily. I should of made him work for it; even thought this is partly my fault as to why I've got myself into this mess.
I just couldn't help but feel let down. It's suppose to be there other way around. I was suppose to be the one to let down Niall, and even hurt him in the end. That's how I was sure of it would have turned out, because of just how I am. I mean I cheated on my girlfriend three times now and I have not once regretted it.
I may sound like a horrible person but trust me I know she's fooling around on me too. I'm not stupid or dumb, he just gives me an assurance of someone always being there because honestly? Lately it's felt like no one has been here for me and I really want to cry. I want to cry so hard- but it's so un masculine.
I really don't want to make myself to seem like I'm littler than I feel.
So I just did what I thought is smart; drinking away my sorrows with the football game playing on the TV across from the bar.
My phone buzzes in my jacket pocket and I grab it and Louis' name is on my screen.
I mumble 'fuck' under my breathe before answering the phone.
"Hey Lou," I say trying really hard to sound sober.
"Harry? Where are you?" He asks. I let out a laugh, did he really care?
"Who wants to know?" I secretly hope it's Niall.
"Niall has been running frantic looking for you," he says. My heart speeding up at his words. Niall is worried?
"Why does he care about mee?" I slurred.
"God Harry, are you drunk?" I giggle. Shit, I've been caught.
"Maybe."
"Where are you? I'm coming to get you." Why does Louis care so much? Really, it's confusing me. I don't  even know the lad really.
"Is that Harry?" I hear a faint voice in the background on the phone.
"Yes Niall-" Louis is cut off before Niall's voice is booming into my hear.
"Harry, how come you haven't been answering my texts?" Niall's voice could have slowed my heart right down, but it doesn't because it's much more pulsing and quivering. He sounds almost worried.
"Niall leave me alone." Not in the mood for him at all, he hurt me.
"No... I'm coming to get you." And the lines dead.

It seems like almost an eternity before Niall, Louis, and Liam are rushing into the bar to my aid.
"Harry, we've had us all worried sick," Niall says. I look over at him and roll my eyes.
"Please, like you care." I didn't want to be rude, especially to Niall but it has to be done. We just have to forget about our little hook up and carry on with our lives and just got back to hating each other.
"I do care about you Harry," he says. I don't believe one bit of that. I scoff before standing up, and just as I get onto my feet I almost fall from being unbalanced but I'm caught in Niall's arms.
"Woah there," he says. I'm still being held in Niall's arms and I'm really enjoying just being here wth him again.
Snap out of it Harry.
"I've got it," I snapped. I stand on my two feet and exit the bar not bothered to wait for anyone.
I walk a little ways before Louis has caught up with me and I really wished it was Niall.
"You okay mate?" He asks. I shake my head no. I don't even want to talk about it.
"Just fine Lou." Sarcasm at its finest.
"I'm sorry," he says. Why is her sorry? I don't want his apology, I want Niall's.
"Why are you sorry? You've got nothing to be sorry about." He seemed to think about how he's going to reply to that. I sped up my walking more, Louis fighting to keep up with my fast pace with his little legs.
"Would you slow down? I'm trying to talk to you." I stop dead in my tracks bumping into him; not ready for my apparent stop.
"You don't need to talk to me Louis. We're not even friends.. And stop trying to get me and Niall together. He's made it quite obvious he doesn't want me and maybe I don't want him either, so just stop fucking meddling with my love life and leave me the fuck alone." He stood there analyzing my words. His lips in a flat line, I thought maybe I would regret my words but I don't. I don't regret them one bit, I don't know it's from the alcohol or just my bitter personality.
So he backed off and walked away from me and me not really caring where he took off to. So I slumped in my spot and continued my walk back to the hotel, not daring to even look back to see if anyone of following me.