The Guy In The Dress

The Guy Without A Clue

Nate basically yelps and hops away, leaving me smirking to my own devices. Meredith glares at me. Does this girl have any other expression towards me? I'm not all that bad. I decide to make an exit. I walk towards the house again but Meredith catches onto the strap of the bra at the back and I am flung backwards. 

"Where do you think you're going?" 

"If you haven't noticed I just fell in a flower bed," I said having lack of an excuse I could work with. I couldn't exactly say, 'Oh sorry I have to go in and change my boobs, they're kinda melting.'

"Toughen up."

"I need to piss."

She gives me a horrified look. I decide to make some fun of this. 

"Yeah, spraying me with the hose wasn't the best idea on that chaps behalf. Touching water goes right through me... like the Nile!" 

"Shut up!" 

I take that as an okay to go. Walking away quite proud of myself, I spin back around.

"Meredith? Y'think I'd need to get this checked out?" A few held back chuckles emitted from the girls. I make a hand motion to my region.

"I mean this can't be normal. Everytime I see you I practically piss myself... no wait that's something entirely different..." 

Splutters of laughter erupts from the girls and Nate has a little chuckle. I give Meredith a little wave and scamper off. In the dorm I freely change my gear and pull out my phone and call Alex. He answers on the third ring.

"Cooper! I've been worried about you, bro!"

"Should have told me that when I was in dire need of your assistance!" I snap. 

"Y'ouch. I see you're still sore about that..."

"Too right I am."

"How is everything coming along?"

"Well so far I've had some barbacue sauce poured on me, a chick in my dorm has seen me naked and oh I have made enemies with the head of the sorority."

"Is the chick hot?"

"Alex, are you kidding me?"

"Is she hot yes or no?"

"She's cute."

"Then you've got something to worry about. It's the cute ones you have too look out for."

"If I could see you I would smack you around so hard..."

"Ooh kinky, Coop."

I sigh and roll my eyes, "How's Callie?"

"She's okay... still in hospital and worried about her little brother fucking up. Do you want me to tell her all your news?"

"No! Um just say... Everything is under control."

"I'm thinking about calling down one of the days to see how you're getting on..."

"If you do you're gay."

"Gay is not an insult, Cooper," he tells me as usual.

"No Alex. The girls think you're gay. I told them you were."

"Why? What have you said dude?"

"They saw the little attack thing and I had to have a back up story. So apparently you were cheating on Callie - me - with Callies little brother, Cooper. Also me."

"So I'm cheating on you with you? That's not confusing." 

"So beware okay dude?"

"You got it."

We hang up and I flop back on the bed, my soggy cotton wool dripping onto my stomach. I quickly change for the first lecture which was on in a half an hour. 

English.

I could do this. I like English. 

I don't like English.

This isn't English. This is analysis of a play I read in my spare time. The professeur looks like an older version of Albert Einstein and has the voice of a chipmunk. So much so that I can only pick up little words of his sentences. Words when put together in a sentence make no sense. 

I'll give you an example. Analysis level of the mother protagonist looses senses of dead father.

Literally those were words I randomely put together. I don't even know what play we're meant to be analysing. 

Sadly the only person in this class in someone who will never tell me what the fuck the assignment was. 

Mia.

I run up to her after.

"Um Mia?"

"Yes." 

"I know you don't like me a lot..."

"Not a lot? I don't like you a little."

"Well I'm glad we got that out in the open!" I reply, keeping my tone light. "But what's the assignment."

"Why would I tell you? What's in it for me?"

"My undying gratitude?" I say hopefully.

"Not enough," she scampers off, leaving me in the middle of the lecture hall, absolutely clueless. By the time I get outside Heather runs at me with a panicked expression.

"Woe woe, Heather, whats up?"

"You're hair."

My hand flies to my hair, which is a little damp but okay.

"What's up with it?"

"You dyed your hair didn't you? What colour was it before hand?"

"Black... I don't know what this has to do with-"

"It's seeping through. If you get it wet one more time your hair is going to have patches of black."

"Can you fix it?"

"You get me black extensions and I can help you." 

*

Let me know what you think!

Picture of Alex ^__^

And this song... well I just think it suits. Plus I was listening to it while I was writing ^.^