It's been months.
Months since I last saw her face.
Months since I've heard her voice.
Months since I've heard her laugh.
Months since I've seen her smile.
Months since her body has touched mine.
Months since the...
I knew it was truly over when I no longer looked at him them same. I realized he wasn't capable of loving me. Something in him switched, like a light being flickered on except his never died down. Instead, he played me for a fool. He even attempted to come back into my life to use me. A few times I found myself allowing him to do so and honestly, I detested that I did so.
She was always beautiful to me. From the moments I lay eyes on her, I knew I needed to have her. Having her wasn't an option.
I wanted him, his voice is what got me.
She was different. We had mutual friends.
He was cute.
She was different.
I just wanted to be his best friend. When we engaged in conversations, he was intellectually empaling.
She was mature. Too mature. I admired her mental.
He was so toxic and I let him drain every each of me.
She always let me have my way.
I'm so stupid--more so was.
I'll forever be in love with her, but I no longer love her. She's not my Leigh-Ann.
He never loved me and that's fine. What's love anyways? Something he never had the capability of giving me.
J u s t i n
It's been months and that's fine.
I haven't touched her or seen her.
I know her smile is still as warm as ever and her heart was still capable of loving, regardless of how much I damaged her.
Her skin is silky smooth, forever and always
And although I still regret each and every moment of letting her go, my ego was just as important and I wasn't willing to hinder that--just like I wasn't willing to break her heart once again.
There would just have to be distance between us.
That was for the best and I knew that now.
Creating distance between us was the logical thing to do.
When things no longer connect, they no longer connect.
Unsatisfied or not, it was the safest thing to do and I was going for it completely.
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