Irresistible

13-Darkness

The song for this chapter is

Problem by Ariana Grande

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I awoke to darkness engulfing me like a blanket., seeming to have been sleeping for a long while. I sat up in bed and stretched my arms out, revealing a missing person. There was a spot in the bed from where he had laid. I sighed in realization that he left and probably for good.

He has his tour to finish up and he can't always be with me; people would become suspicious, especially the other lads. I let my legs dangle off the side of the bed; ready to embrace the soft, plush, tan carpet. I stand up and my feet meet the carpet.

As I begin to walk, I feel an unfamiliar urge in the back of my throat. I quickly and carefully walk to the bathroom, throw the toilet seat up and lurch just in time, into the toilet. I flushed the toilet and realized I hadn't pulled my hair back; which means I need to take a shower. Shit. I strip of my clothes and brush my teeth before I enter the shower. I hate the nasty taste of vomit in my mouth, it's the worst thing you'll ever taste in your entire life.

I hopped into the shower and began scrubbing at my hair to get the disgusting reek out. After my hair smells like freshly picked strawberries, I begin washing my body. I reach my stomach and leave my hand there. I was only a month along, it's weird to think something is growing inside of there. It's barely noticeable that I'm pregnant; only seems like I've gained a bit of weight.

I finished washing and rinsing and removed myself from the shower. It feels very strange to take a shower late at night. I dried my body and walked into my room. I found some sweats and cuddled into them. I put my hair into a messy bun and walked to the kitchen.

The kitchen is my favourite part of the house. It helps any mood I'm ever in. I picked my phone up from the table where it lay and say my background; a picture of me and my best-friend.

I haven't talked to Brittany in so long. I wonder how college is going for her. I feel terrible for not calling or sending a text her way. She doesn't really know all that happened and is happening. I think I'll invite her over today... She's probably sleeping, so I will text her later.

I grabbed my phone and plopped onto the couch, I need to text Harry.

"We need to talk" I typed, then pushed send.

"I told you to get rid of this number" I quickly received a response

"You can't do this to me, we have to keep in contact. I can't let you go, not only for my sake but also our child's." I carefully thought out and put into words.

"I'm only 21, and I have made a terrible mistake. As much as I would love to help,I simply can't. If the boys find out-if Paul finds out- if management finds out- hell if the fucking fans find out it would be a complete disaster. It's all to risky. If someone reads my texts-I-I'm really sorry. You can abort the baby if you wish, I will understand and will approve. xx"

It wasnt anyone finding out that bothered me. It was the fact that he didnt care; his words not mine. He said the worst thing I couldve ever imagined. I can't believe he would expect me to have an abortion. Who the fuck does he think I am? I will take responsibility for this, it was partially my fault. I can't even reply to his text; my heart aches too much.

I'm not just going to give up the most precious thing in the world. I guess I will do this alone.

I won't ruin his reputation, his image, or even his career. I will act like I never met the boy. It will be hard, of course, but I can do it. Two can play this game, if he wants to be an asshole, I will be one too.

I found myself curled up into a ball crying on my sofa. Why am I crying? Why can't I let it go-let him go? He doesn't care about me-or his child-our child. Why is it so hard for me to resist him? Simple. He has burned a hole in my heart. I thought I had him since the moment I had met him, but I was terribly wrong.

I decided what my final reply would be

"Goodbye"

I pressed send and felt my heart shatter, and I dropped my phone.

It was my stupidity to believe be would love me-to believe anyone would love me. My parents sure as hell didnt.

I grabbed my earbuds from the table and shoved them into my ears after inserting them into my previously dropped phone.

"You wanna play, you wanna stay you wanna have it all. You started messing with my head until I hit a wall, maybe I shoulda known, maybe I shoulda known, that you would walk, you would walk ,out the door."

"Said we were done, you met someone and rubbed it in my face. cut to the part she broke your heart and then she ran away I guess You shoulda known I guess you shoulda known that I would talk that I would talk"

"But even if the stars they all collide I never want you back into my life, you can take your words and all your lies, oh-oh-oh I really don't care."

I really don't care by Demi Lovato began to fill my ears;then I drifted off into a not needed sleep.

__________________________________
THIS IS ONE OF THE TWO UPDATES, AND LONG CHAPTER YES? I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND THANK YOU FOR ALL THE VOTES I LOVE YOU ALL AND KEEP SPREADING THE WORD. I HOPE YOU ENJOY READING THIS STORY AS MUCH AS I ENJOY WRITING IT. I CAN'T THANK YOU ALL ENOUGH. HAVE A WONDERFUL WEEKEND :D