Broken Souls

A Gift From The Ocean

"We're going out to get a sixth team member today." I announce to the others once we've finally settled what happened. Ten is still out chasing Rose, so that just leaves D'spinas, Reginae, and Fang.

"Already?" Reginae asks. "Do you think Clay would have wanted this?"
"Do you think Clay cared about the welfare of the team, much less who his replacement would be?" I ask, arms folded. The calmness of my own voice is killing me slowly.

"He would have cared about how quickly you got over it. When I die, are you going to mourn me for ten minutes? Are we like that pet miniature Goldeen that you buy at a carnival and flush down the toilet without hesitation when it dies?"

"She is trying to move forwards. We need to continue." D'spinas says sharply. "Stop making baseless accusations. It is unbecoming of such a usually logical Pokemon."

"Don't try to bring any kind of intelligence into this. You know exactly what you're doing." Reginae's nostrils flare. "Count me out of this. I've fought enough today."

"Me too." Rose lands, Ten at her side. "I'm going to bury Clay."

"Not on your own you aren't." I tell her.

Reginae tells me, "I'll go too."

"We should put her next to Luna." Rose insists. She bows her head. "I- I can't... nevermind. Reginae?"

Reginae's nostrils flare again and the two of them depart in unison. My body feels numb with coldness.

D'spinas's wings hum, an ominous noise that sounds more like hissing than anything a human could produce. "What did you have in mind for our sixth member, Ashley?"

I blink out of my intense focus on the departing duo, who are now disappearing into the town.

Oh Arceus, please let them be okay...

"We need a water type Pokemon." I tell her. "If we want to get across Whirl Islands to Cianwood, that is. They might have a ferry or something else equally useful but knowing Johto we shouldn't count on it. There definitely wasn't one last time."

"How do you plan on getting one?"
I pull my fishing rod (as mentioned earlier, I have no idea how it fits in there) out of my bag and fling it forwards into the ocean. Something nips almost immediately and I slam upwards, which barely dangles it out of the surf. It seems to be thoroughly stuck, so I reel it in just below the water, until its clear that I've hooked something, at least.

Thrashing beneath the steely grip of my fishing hook is... a Magikarp. Joy.

"Well that was a waste of time." I say. "Guess I'm throwing this back." I unhook it, pick the slimy, writhing Magikarp up, and prepare to throw.

"Wait! No, don't throw it back!" Fang protests.

"It's a Magikarp." I tell him. "I don't know if you know this, but they're basically useless."

"Well, yeah, but they evolve into Gyarados! Flippin' Gyarados! Come ooooon, can we please keep her? I promise I'll train her myself and make sure she doesn't get dehydrated. She can be my sidekick!"

"You know what? Fine. I was going to have to grind our surfing Pokemon anyways." I press a Pokeball to its face. My Pokedex lights up and begins immediately going over all the statistics and vital information. "So, what are we going to name her?"

"Alright. Hear me out... how about Tsunami, destroyer of worlds?!"

"River Song." Ten says, clearly excited.

"Pisces." D'spinas suggests.

"Pisces it is." I tell them, throwing the Pokeball out. The Magikarp, now christened Pisces, flails desperately on the ground. "Go wild."

"Yeah! I'm going to be the best mentor ever. Then, when she's a Gyarados, she's going to learn Hyper Beam and I'm gonna be an Umbreon. We could rule the world together!"

"Not without supervision you aren't." D'spinas says. "You heard the rules. No one goes out on their own, and with your level and her abilities, you might as well be."

"I'll handle this." D'spinas tells them finally. "It would be quickest." She turns and shoots into the water. A Goldeen rises to the surface, a huge needle impaled straight into its chest.

"Sounds good." I say, retreating back further onto the beach. Carefully I sit myself down into the sand, which flies out around me, and I curl myself inwards, bringing my legs up towards my chest. Further down the beach, in the dusky twilight, Fang weaves in and out of the surf with D'spinas. The two of them look satisfied, even happy, and then Fang is rushing over Pisces, moving her into the surf to breathe and then out again. The Magikarp looks slightly bigger already.

Why are Pokemon so relaxed about this kind of thing? While clearly Rose and Reginae had a stronger reaction, it was just a few days ago that Luna died as well and not one of them has mentioned it. Is it something about their DNA? Can they not process empathy the way that humans do, despite being sentient?

Of course they aren't human. You've just been treating them like they are for so long that you can't comprehend that they're different.

Ten flutters down beside me, his wings silent but his landing significantly less so.

"They won't be angry at you forever."

"We don't even grieve as a time. How can we stick together as one?" I ask him. "At this point,

"At this point last time, how many of your Pokemon were dead?"
"A lot more." I admit. "Are you trying to make me feel better or worse?"

"What I'm trying to get at is that you've improved as a trainer."

"I keep failing." I insist. "I have no idea what to do... I'm so scared. I can't keep going like this."

"You aren't a failure, Ashley! Remember not long ago when we talked about this in the hotel?"
"Yes, but it wasn't supposed to happen again this soon! It wasn't supposed to happen ever again."

"You and I both know that was never going to happen." Ten warns me. "What you have done for all of us has been spectacular work so far. Don't sell yourself short."

"Spectacular work like what, almost getting all of you killed? What about that time when I did get everyone killed? Sure, that was brilliant of me." I throw my head into my hands.

"They wouldn't want you to quit, Ashley."
"They'd know that I couldn't or the entire world will blow up. That's not bravery, that's just traumatizing. One of those things builds character and the other obliterates it. Funny how I keep ending up on the wrong side of that, huh? Man, being a Pokemon trainer is the best."

Ten tilts his head. "I don't get you sometimes."

"Me neither." I tell him. "Should we check on that funeral?"
"You don't really want to be there." he replies.

"No," I admit. "I don't. He hated me, Rose hates me, Reginae is angry at me, and I just want to throw myself in the ocean."

"Not another word!" Ten tells me. "You don't have to go. I can be your eyes in the sky, if you'd like. Just... don't drown."
"I'll try not to." I say, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Oh, and Ashley? It might seem like you'll never see them again, but don't give up hope yet. After all, I haven't." His wings open wide and he soars away.

My heart murmurs in my chest and I know very suddenly that he's looking for someone.