Always My Thug

eightythree.

Noami's POV

I rolled over and looked at the clock. I didn't get out because I didn't know if I wanted to move or not. I wanted to go but I didn't want to go alone, because I didn't know if Tray was going to ignore me and I don't know how to react to this.

I don't want to make this whole thing about me because I loved CJ. He kept me together and he was someone I could talk to, especially when a time like this comes.

I rolled back over and put the covers over my head. Tyson started kicking and then the door opened.

"Mom, I don't feel like going." I said.

"And why not?" Tray asked sitting on the bed next to me.

I quickly pulled down the covers and I looked at him.

"What?" he asked.

"He hasn't kicked since I left yesterday."

"What you trying to say?" he asked.

"He started to kick before you opened the door. I guess he knew it was daddy." I said sitting up.

"Well, after all that sh*t yesterday, I knew you were going to leave. But as of not coming to the funeral, that's something you can't do." he said.

"The crew is pissed with me, and I'm not trying to make this about myself. I want to be there and be there for you and give my respect to CJ because I loved him like he was my brother. But I don't.......

"Noami, we not even about to worry about that sh*t right now. You about to get the fck out this bed and get the fck......

"Stop fcken cursing at me! I'm not one of your boys, I'm your wife. Or am I? Because you're not giving a fck about me at the fcken moment."

"You know what, get dressed or stay in the bed. I can't do this right now." he said leaving out slamming the door.

I pulled the covers over my head and started to cry. And then the door opened again and the lights came on.

"Noami, baby." my mom said coming to cradle me.

"Mom, I can't do it."

"I heard that he wants you to come. That's a start right?" she asked.

"That's not my husband. When I look into his eyes, when he talks to me, he curses and I don't know who he is. That's not him." I stated.

"He's going through the exact same thing you was going through with Destiny. He's just handling it differently."

"Why can't he talk to me?" I asked.

"The same reason, you couldn't talk to him. But you know, he was right there by your side at the funeral. It wouldn't be right if you wasn't by his." she said.

"Maybe, you're right." I stated

"Now, come on. We gotta get dressed for a funeral." she said helping me out of the bed.

I got up and got into the shower. When I got out, I flat ironed my hair and did my makeup. But I didn't do a lot because I know that I'm going to be crying and I don't want an eyelash to falloff.

I went to closet and put on a black dress and a pair of ankle black heels. Then I threw on a blue jean jacket. I grabbed my purse and phone and me and moms left out.

I tried calling Tray to meet up with him but he didn't answer.

"He's not answering the phone." I stated to my mom.

"Well, we'll just meet him there and if we find him then we'll go in with him." she said.

"And if we don't?" I questioned.