I Need Your Love (Nathan Sykes fanfic)

Chapter 3- Ashley and Shopping Spree!

“No, I’m not letting you do that. You have so much more to live for,” I cut Tom off.

“No, I don’t. You may know what I’ve been through, but that doesn’t mean you know what it felt like. I thought that you out of all the boys would be so kind to just let me die. If you really want to help me, then you should let kill myself. You know all the cuts and bruises I have? I don’t even feel them anymore! I put on a fake smile all the time. I don’t know what my real smile looks like because I haven’t used it in so long! Okay Tom, I just wish I could jump out of this bus and die in the middle of the road. But thanks to you I can’t.” I push him away and rush out of the bathroom, there’s got to be something I can use in here. I run into a stack of CDs waking the boys.

“What the hell are you doing?” I hear Max moan.

“Lads wake up! Air’s gone crazy. Like seriously.” Tom shouts and Nathan pops out of his bed.

“Why don’t boys have something sharp?!? You’d think they would!” I scream. The rest of the boys wake up and try to catch me put I slither away. I finally find a pair of scissors and they will have to do for now. I press them down hard on my arms then slide it across. Instantly, relief fills my body. Jay finds me and takes the scissors away from me. “Give those back!” I scream at him.

“No.” He hands them to Siva, who runs away. I lunge at him knocking him to the ground and take the scissors. Another slit forms on my arm.

“Heaven.” A small moan escapes my lips. Nathan then grabs them out of my hands and throws them put the bus window. “Why did you do that!?!”

“Because, I was saving your life for the third time!” He shouts back at me.

“Did you ever think I wanted to be saved!?! Nathan, I want to die for a reason. You don’t even fucking know me! You don’t know my story; you don’t know all the shit I’ve been through! Just be happy I haven’t flung myself out of the bus!” I start crying and sink to my knees.

“I’m sorry. I know I don’t know,” He starts.

“Shut up! I don’t need some snobby boy band to comfort me! I knew I should have never come with you guys! You should have just let me jump off the building!” My nails are digging into my palms and they start bleeding. Nathan grabs my hands.

“Stop it. We can’t take you to the hospital so,” I cut him off a second time.

“I don’t want to go to the hospital! I just want to die! But you don’t get that, do you?” I whisper to myself. “You guys should just let me out, now. What will the fans or the press think when they find out that you’re carrying a psycho depressed girl on your bus. Ha, what would Mike think? And when he finds out I told Tom about him. He’d kill us all.” I laugh to myself.

“What did she tell you?” Siva asks Tom.

“Well to sum it up, her dad left her and her mom for a slut, her mom was a stripper and that’s where she met Mike, then he started doing creepy shit to Air, her mom died of drugs, and Mike is going to kill air because we know about him. Oh yea, and Air was also a stripper at Mike’s strip club.” Tom adds quickly.

“But… your only 18, today.” Nathan says confused.

“No shit Sherlock. I was a stripper when I was 16, then Mike found out I cut and stuff so he fired me and started abusing me more. But he didn’t do gross stuff anymore, he said he felt sick just looking at me.” I reply.

“Okay so this Mike guy… rapped you?” Nathan asks, and I nod. His fists clench in rage. “No wonder you’d want to die…” He mumbles to himself. He brings me into his chest, where I cry, my nails digging into his back but he’s still hard as a rock. “I’m so sorry.” This time I don’t make a remark, I just let myself cry. This is the first time I’ve ever talked to anyone about my problems, let alone 5 famous boys in The Wanted.