I Need Your Love (Nathan Sykes fanfic)

Chapter 9- I'm finally happy

I’m finally in a happy place, with no cares. My life is good, and I can admit that. I can also admit that I haven’t cut myself once in a whole week. Because I have now let myself be happy, and feel joy, live each moment that occurs instead of thinking of ways to commit suicide. It’s amazing how much a person can heal over just a few short weeks. I feel freer now, not held down by all my worries and troubles. Even though I may not be completely okay, I’m still better. I’m eating again and go out in public more. But, even though I’m not cutting I am smoking, but it’s a step up and not like I haven’t done it before.

I think to myself about the past weeks while I lie down on the floor, Nathan sitting behind me playing with my hair, Tom and Max playing some sort of video game on the small T.V. in the bus, Jay and Rain cuddling on the couch, and Siva talking to Nareesha on his phone.

The moment is ruined by Rain running to the bathroom. I follow her and she starts throwing up.  I hold her hair back as she does so while Jay grabs her some water then hands it to me. Her head moves up from the bowl so I hand her the glass and she chugs it down. “Can I talk to you?” She asks me. I nod and Jay leaves the room, shutting the door behind him. Rain’s shaking hands reach to her, or should I say Jay’s, sweater pockets then pulls out… a pregnancy test. It’s positive. “I took a lot, and they were all the same.” She starts crying.

“Come here.” I pull her into a hug, letting her cry into me.

“Jay isn’t going to want to stay with me when he finds out I’m pregnant.” She sobs. “I don’t want another kid.”

“Well, you don’t have to have another one.” I say and she looks up at me.

“Well yea, I kind of do. I’m pregnant you idiot.” She says to me annoyed.

“I know that you’re pregnant. But there is a way to stop that.” She smiles slightly finally getting what I’m saying.

“Well, wait what am I saying? No. I’m not going to get rid of my baby!” She shouts at me and I throw my arms up defensively.

“I was just suggesting.” I start. “So what are you going to do then?”

“I’ll probably just hide it until I’m too big to hide it. Jay and I need to further out relationship before I can tell him we’re having a kid together.” She answers.

“Well I’m going to go back to Nathan.” Even just saying his name makes me smile. As I walk out of the bathroom I notice that the bus seems oddly empty. My phone vibrates and it reads:

Nath- Went out with the boys we’ll be back soon. Luv ya <3

When I read the last part my heart skips a beat. Even though I may not be as scared of the ‘L’ word, it still makes me freak a little.

Air- Awwwww, why’d you leave?? :(

Nath- Sorry, the lads really wanted to go. We’ll be back before the concert. U gonna come this time? :)

I haven’t gone to any of the concerts because I feel that once Nath and my’s relationship is put in the open people will go nuts… on me. Everyone will hate me and send me like death threats or something. All I know is that I don’t need to go through that right now.

Air- I don’t think so. Rain isn’t feeling well so I think I’ll just hang out with her.

Nath- Well okay, I guess you can just hang out. When can I go public to the fans about us?

Air- Just, not right now. Soon though <3

I lie to him. That’s what I’ve been saying for two weeks now.

Nath- *huffs dramatically* fine… Well I have to go, see you later babe :)

Wait, why can’t he still text me? It’s not like the boys really care. They better be doing something important… Being the jealous girlfriend I am I text Max.

Air- So where’d you boys go?

Maxxy- A bar… Didn’t Nath tell you??

Air- No actually… Can you do me a favor?

Maxxy- Anything for you :)

Air- Now this sounds pretty weird but, can you keep an eye on Nathan for me? I just don’t want him getting into trouble… Wait you guys are going to a bar before you’re concert? :D

Maxxy- Yea, and sure. He is a bit of a trouble maker that one ;) I’ll let you know if he gets into any trouble

Air- Shanks Maxxy, luv ya :*

The relationship I have with Max is more like a brother and sister kind of thing so it doesn’t make me freak out when we say the ‘L’ word to each other. Rain walks into the room so we decide that since we’ll be alone for a while we’ll just have a little slumber party. I grab blankets, pillows and The Notebook while she gets popcorn, licorice and pop. Now you may think it’s a little weird that we could find all of this stuff but it turns out that the boys are real into their own little slumber parties.

Half way through the movie Rain and I are already crying. It’s just such an amazing movie.

I'm gonna pick up the pieces,

 And build a Lego house

 If things go wrong we can knock it down

 My three words have two meanings,

 There's one thing on my mind

 It's all for you

I hear my ringtone so I wipe my eyes then answer it. “Ariana?” Max says quickly, almost out of breath.

“Yea. It’s me.” I start to cry again.

“Oh, are you okay?” He asks worried.

“Yea, Rain and I are just watching The Notebook. So why’d you call?”

“Well, you told me to call if Nathan does something.”

“What did he do?”

“You sure you want to know?”

“Just tell me Max!”

“Fine… Nathan, is kissing a girl.” The phone falls to the ground and my crying becomes harder, but this time from all the things I thought and knew all my life.

So, I started the chapter off all nice and happy, then I threw the pregnancy bom, and then we findout Nath is mackn’ up some drunken girl. Hope you enjoyed!

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~Morgan <3