suicidal love

Chapter 22

There's a cold dark corner
in the back of my room,
it speaks to me
and says I'm coming for you.

As I lie on my bed
in the fetal position,
my eyes are closed
hoping and wishing.

Maybe that one day
my dreams will come true,
that I don't have to be here
so down and blue.

That corner keeps talking
about how I'm going to die,
all I can do
is lie there and cry.

As the corner gets closer
and takes me in,
my soul starts to burn
as so does my skin.

I put my pencil down as my thoughts were cut by a knock on the door.

"Carolina what are you still doing in your room?" My mom asked firmly.

"Nothing" I simply said.

"Then what time is it young lady?"

"Six . Why mom?"

"It's six o'clock sharp means it's dinner time" she said with a triumphant smile.

"But I'm not hungry mom" I rolled my eyes.

"Listen up young lady I said it's time for dinner so get moving or else" she said sharply.

I remembered that I'm still not in a good situation with mom and I'm still punished and she still didn't give me the things that she took away after my suicide attempt.
I told her that I'll get down in 5 as she left the room.

After mom had left my room, I shut the door and locked myself away as I mopped for hours on end. At this point in time, I was missing my stereo the most. I would have killed someone to get some music, anything but this silence. I knew if i gave into my mother, and asked her to listen to music in the lounge room that she would let me.
Mom wasn't completely heartless but she didn't want to cave first either.

And then, speaking of the devil, mom called me downstairs.
I ever so sluggishly made my way downstairs and mom told me someone was on the phone.
So i guess all the phone privileges weren't gone, I just had to speak in a public domain

"Five minutes", said mom loud enough for the person on the other end of the call to hear. Great, I guess I had time limits now, too.

Could I do anything ?

I held back my temper and started having a more whatever altitude, because I simply couldn't be bothered anymore.

"Four minutes and counting" she yelled.

I felt like one of her servants she ordered around but still I picked up the phone. "Hello?" I asked, not bothering to try and act happy. And my tone almost sounded as lifeless as i felt inside.

"Hey, it's me. Dude what's the go with your mom?" Said Destiny. And I could faintly hear people in the background.

"I don't know I'm on lockdown or some shit". I said, making sure to put a lot of sarcasm around the word 'lockdown'.

"Okay whatever I'm at the party and coming to pick you up". At this point of our conversation, he was just sounding hyperactive, and speaking so fast that I could barely understand him. Then someone started blaring music in the background, and Destiny continued speaking, but I could barely hear a word. All I heard was something that sounded like a time. And then the phone cut out.

I stood at the phone table for several minutes repetitively saying hello, until I turned and noticed that mom had pulled out the cord.

"Five minutes is up", she told me.
I groaned and stormed back up to my room, slamming my door behind me.