Suitcase // p.l.

5

The page count is long, IK. But it's cause there's a v important message at the end that I feel very strongly about.
*

Everybody's always giving me a reason. Everybody's always telling me to go. None of them could ever feel the way I'm feeling

Phil walked past the kitchen where Dan was making a sandwich, stopping when Dan cleared his throat.

"How'd it go?" Dan asked, turning and looking at Phil.

Phil grinned, walking into the kitchen, "Well, I gave her the ring."

"About bloody time," Dan laughed, "I remember when it came in the mail and you were all excited. You came back from the date and you still had the damn box in your pocket."

"Shut up," Phil and Dan both laughed. "How's Aleysa?"

"Doing better, definitely. A little nervous about living alone, but she's happy she's somewhere where Julian won't be able to find her." Dan spoke as he placed the top on his sandwich. He pushed it down, then picked it up, ready to bite into it. He noticed Phil still standing there, stopping himself from taking a bite.

"What is it Phil?"

"She thought I was proposing to her!" Phil whined, throwing his arms in the air and beginning to pace back and forth. "I felt horrible! The look on her face when she saw the ring.. Dan she looked like she saw a basket full of kittens!"

"Why kittens?" Dan asked.

"And then I told her it was a promise ring and for a split second, she looked disappointed."

Dan bit into his sandwich as Phil rambled on. Dan wasn't shocked about any of this, honestly. It's why he never got Aleysa a promise ring in the two years they were dating.

As Phil continued, Dan made tea, occasionally humming to show he was listening. Finally once the tea was done, he grabbed both cups and turned towards Phil, "Tea?"

Phil looked at the cups, then at Dan, "We're you listening to me?"

"Of course.. Not. Here have tea." He shoved the tea towards Phil, laughing a little. Phil couldn't help but giggle, a little upset but taking the tea anyway.

They sat down at the dining table in the lounge, sipping their tea as Dan ate his sandwich. "So.. Jewel's really leaving, huh?"

"Yeah." Phil whispered, looking down at his tea. "But it's okay. Cause she's gonna do great out there. She's gonna meet nice people.. Maybe even a nice guy and finally settle down."

Dan looked up at Phil, seeing Phil tear up at the mention of her being with someone else. "Phil, don't cry." Dan frowned. "Even if she does meet someone smarter than you," Dan joked, trying to lighten the mood, "She'll still come back. But for now, you realize you gotta let her go."

"Not until she leaves." He said, "I won't let her go until she gets on that plane."

Dan sighed, looking at his half empty tea cup. "Okay Phil.."

*
I wanna talk about something serious with you BFFs for a moment. (You can skip this if you wish, but it'd be nice if you didn't :3)

When I was in elementary school, I'll be completely honest, I was bullied for my weight and the way I looked. I was called "fat, pregnant," and even "obese." I was also called ugly and on April fools day in 4th grade, someone came up to me and said "hey Hillary you're pretty. April fools" and laughed right in face and walked away from me.

Fast forward to 7th grade I started growing a little femstach. I got made fun of for it since everyone else got rid of theirs and also got bullied for my unstraight teeth. Also got bullied cause i didn't do my eyebrows and everyone started doing theirs in 7th grade

So over time I learned to cover these things up. In 8th grade I started shaving my femstach and in sophomore year I began waxing my eyebrows. I learned to apply makeup correctly so I look natural and pretty, but I soon started to care less about my weight

Until freshman year

In freshman year I wore a crop top to school with high wasted jeans to cover my
"Belly". Now my jeans fell to my waste and I didn't notice. I was leaned over, talking to one of my friends in my class when these "popular" girls - one of them pretends to be my friend and I hate her so much - took a very unflattering picture of me and posted it on snapchat for her 80+ friends to see. People took screenshots, and one girl in particular posted it on INSTAGRAM, where she told me to "stop shopping at babies r us" and to "tell me to stop dressing like a slut when nobody wanted me"

I had a boyfriend at the time and she was single and a bitch so idk what she was on about -.-

Anyway, I gave away all my crop tops and threw away most of my bikinis and preferred not to wear tight shirts. I wear baggy shirts and if I wear tight shirts I wear a baggy sweater over it now to cover it up, and vowed I'd get revenge on them one day for what they did

So the other day, I was thinking about how I saw a photo of a girl who was more on the thick side like me. She got in shape for her amazing boyfriend who loved her despite how she got bullied for her weight and he had awesome arm candy. She ended up marrying him

Now I'm not saying I wanna marry Louis, but hey it wouldn't be bad

And then, I saw a photo of Khloé Kardashian. Now I don't like the Kardashians, it's no secret. But lately I've been team Kardashian. And I'm all for Khloé rn. She lost weight after being called "the fat one" for most of her life, like me. She finally reached her "revenge" body

So one day I woke up, looking at my photo of Louis and then at Khloé and decided to start working out.

I'm already starting to feel more confident, I looked in the mirror and saw that you can already tell I'm losing weight and that my curves are showing a lot more

Now I can't do anything about my teeth myself, but I have braces and oh I can't wait for senior year to smile and show every one of those assholes that I'm no longer "buck teeth Blake"

Basically what I'm trying to get to here is that, if you get bullied for whatever the reason, trust me, I know it's really hard at first. But as it goes on you get more confident in your own skin. And if you're not, don't turn to violence, the best revenge, as Khloé puts it, is to look good. And that's exactly what I plan on doing. And I think if you BFFs have any sort of issue with bullying, whether it's about your weight or the way you look, or even just about things you like, don't fight back. The best revenge is always to look good. And if you don't have the energy to look good, then here's a trick: Just sit back and watch. Those who do you wrong will eventually fuck up themselves, and if you're lucky, God will let you watch.

That's what happened to me, the girl who posted that pic of me on Instagram got beat up and suspended from school then she moved to Maryland. And before that her boyfriend came out that he was gay. And her acting career went to shit when she auditioned for something on Broadway and she usually gets major rolls like that but when they declined he I just knew her "career" was over. And then a boy who bullied me for years got expelled from school. And I was there, watching the whole thing

Well, enough about me.

"You should never make fun of someone for something they can't change." ~ Hillary xx